Lucius : caaaaannnn!

LJ: : anybodyyyy!

Lucius : find meeee!

Slender : somebody to loveeeee!

Lucius: where the hell did you learn to sing?

Slender: like I said, I had a daughter...

Lucius: oh... so... where is this cRYPT guy?

Slender: his base is at Mount Hood in Oregon

Lucius: ._.

Slender: what?

Lucius: how the hell are we supposed to walk from Mane to Oregon

Slender: oh... huh... ummm... I never really thought of that...

Lucius: *sigh*

[the song was, Somebody To Love By Queen]

cRYPT: Boots! Trevor! Caller!

Trevor: yes?

Caller: yes?

Boots: ... (yes?)

cRYPT: I have a task for you...

Trevor and Caller: what is it?

Boots: ... (like you can't do it)

cRYPT: I want you to take down the other Proxys

Trevor: but Zalgo says-

cRYPT: i d0NT cAR3 wHAT zALLG0 sAYS? i wANT sL3ND3R t0 sUFF3R?

Boots: ... (dam*it, he is going cryptic again)

Caller: we are on it sir!

All: *all leave*

cRYPT: Jane!

Jane: yes?

cRYPT: take down RED... we are having war on both sides...

Jane: bu-

cRYPT: g0?

Jane: yes sir! *teleports*

cRYPT: *sigh*

Porter: all this is just because you could not get along with Zalgo!

Slender: its not that!

Porter: then tell us what was the reason?

Slender: *sigh* as you most all of you know before the treaty broke, me and Skully went to silent burol for a meeting. during are stay Zalgos army came... they killed everyone...

Jeff: including Skully?

Slender: yes, I did not tell you due to you guys having some mga kaibigan there...

LJ: shi* just got real!

Slender: we have to save them!

Masky: its to dangerous!

Lucius: screw dangerous! we're already on death row!

Slender: I'm going to save them! I don't care if its dangerous!

Lucius: me and LJ are going with him!

LJ: wai-

Lucius: you owe me! You have no Idea how many times I have answered the door!

LJ: ok... let me get my vodka!

Lucius: you know buddy, since your on death row I should tell you something... you better be grateful I'M killing you... you could have been killed sa pamamagitan ng a tall faceless guy with a VERY bad temper. now that I've told you that, TO HEAVEN OR HELL FUC*ER!

*Bang*

Lucius: heh heh... he got blood on my suit...

*on the way home*

Lucius: to heaven or hell... its cheesy but it is better than "you shouldn't have done that"

*Crash*

Lucius: who's there? if it's the cops I done
nuthin!

???: hello there...

Lucius: who are you?

???: the tanong is... who are you?

Lucius: says the girl that has a clock for an eye

Clockwork: says the guy that just murdered someone

Lucius: says the girl that somehow knows about it

Clockwork: says the guy that... umm

Lucius: my point exactly

Slender: LUCIUS! JEFFRY!

Both: *run in* yes?

Slender: we ran out of milk

Both: ._.

*intermission*

Lucius: ok... we got Slenderman the gatas and you a toy

Jeff: yay!

Lucius: but due to me being broke we can't afford to even get on a bus

Jeff: aww

*crash*

Lucius: huh? who's there?!

Johnny: HAIL LUMAR! *charges at lucius*

Lucius: *steps to the right*

*flop*

Johnny: *stands up* oww... I shall kill you Zalgo demons!

Lucius: we don't work for Zalgo buddy

Johnny: LIES! *charges at Lucius*

Lucius: *steps to the left*

*flop*

Johnny: dam*it!

Slender: uy can you tell me the plan again?

Lucius: aren't you the one that created it?

Slender: so is that a yes?

Lucius: why do you want a run through anyway?

Slender: I forgot?

Lucius: ...

Slender: Jeff bonked me on the head?

Lucius: ...

Slender: Zalgo wiped my memory?

Lucius: ...

Slender: I have amnesia?

Bro: he doesn't *walks away*

Lucius: you are fooling no one Targeter

???: no

Lucius: what?

Dolan: is actually Dolan

Lucius: da faq?

Dolan: bit*h pls

*ding dong*

EJ: ugh... I'll be right back *poof*

*opens door*

EJ: hello good sir! how may I help you?

Henry: hi, my name is Henry... im here to talk abou-

EJ: no *slams door*

Slender: what was that about?

EJ: Laughing Jack went out side and someone saw him

Slender: wow

EJ: yep

Lucius: that idiot

EJ: well... I'll go get jack

Lucius: and don't come back!

All: ...

Me: sorry, my creative Pagsulat kinda ran out today...

Lucius: you better be!

Jeff: I thought it was funny...

Lucius: oh hey! I forgot you were here...

Lucius: so... you live here alone with the other Jack?

EJ: no... I convinced Laughing Jack to house other pastas that got raided sa pamamagitan ng SCP corp.

Lucius: cool

EJ: hey, where is masky?

Slender: he had a puso attack

EJ: well... where is he?

Slender: I sent him to 49 with ToTheArk

*meanwhile*

49: I will cure you

ToTheArk: you know he is passed out and he can't hear you right?

49: oh... pass me the the medkit

173: ...

49: PASS ME THE MEDKIT!

173: ...

49: its like i'm talking to a statue...

Observer: I fold

Zalgo: so... what happened?

Observer: He went kamikaze on my as*

SL: like a true wimp

Observer: says the guy that hides in the shadows for a living

SL: oh shut-up!

All: ...

Observer: so... whats up with the whole "when the world ends he lets out sigh" thing?

SL: I bet

Zalgo: its just a thing I created to scare slender

Observer: oh

Zalgo: honestly, if the world ended I would be dancing

SL: uy it's your turn!

Lucius: i'm sorry, but i'm still trying to figure out how I got here

Slender: ZALGO!

Zalgo: hello old friend! how are the kids?

Slender: What the hell Zalgo!

Zalgo: what? I wanted to know who he was!

Slender: no you did not!

Zalgo: ok you caught me, I wanted him for my army...

Slender: this is the shi* that makes m-

Zalgo: on my defense I did tell Shadow to tell You after he got the info

Slender: thats it... THE TREATY IS BROKEN!

Zalgo: WHAT?

Slender: you back-stab and spy all the time!

Zalgo: do you realize what you are saying?

Slender: yes

Zalgo: *sigh* well then... shall we meet again?

Slender: not likely

*both teleport*

Zalgo: Observer, the treaty is broken... you know what to do

Observer: finally...

Lucius: A proxy? no thanks guys... I kept my mouth closed and like I said, I kill for the true law and i'm not a psycho like you Mr. hockey mask, and killer clown guy... I respect you... you couldn't help yourself. but now you are a sadistic freak with no frien-

Masky: Jeff, just put him to sleep with the shovel

*Bong*

???: wake up my child.

Lucius: what the hell happened to your face?

Slender: well he's a charmer...

Masky: sorry boss, he is just like that.

Slender: do you know why you are here?

Lucius: yep and im 47 years old...

Slender: oh... are you ready for proxy training?

Lucius: do i have a choice?

Slender: no.

Lucius: OK but one question... who was phone?

Slender and masky: ...

Jack [singing]: help me bob, I'm bully in the alley!

All [singing]: way hey, bully alley!

Kage and Jack [singing]: help me bob, I'm bully in the alley

All [singing]: bully down in shinbone al!

Henry: what should we do? Slender and his mga kaibigan are separated, and Zalgo and cRYPT are at war.

Vendetta: well... Johnny is working on bringing the proxys on the run to us... Once they are brought we will think of something...

Henry: until then?

Vendetta: we gather madami members

Henry: yes sir

Vendetta: we get the pirate next

Henry: I can't go sa pamamagitan ng myself sir... He is unstable

Vendetta: I will send Alex with you

Alex: what?

Vendetta: you two leave tomorrow

Henry: yes sir

Alex: what!?

I am Kozmotis, bringer of news, ones that have been long awaited for this fandom.

I ilathala this before I too disappear from the face of the earth. I know everything now. Please madala with me. They exist, and have a contract with- not zalgo- but the government. They take care of the people surrounding a certain forest, and the government lets them be and observes what they are from afar.

So dear children play nice, because they will come and watch you if they think you know all about them. Please pray for me as I go to their forest on a suicide mission.

*Screaming*

Jean: tonight we feast on the innocent my lobo friends! *howls*

Wolfs: *howls*

Henry: I thought you would be dead sa pamamagitan ng now

Jean: I don't age since I'm not a puny human like you...

Henry: I think I would know since of your... large meal

Jean: what do you want?

Henry: we would like your brute strength to sumali us again

Jean: why should I?! what makes you think I would sumali again?!

Henry: they broke the treaty

Jean: what? let us feed on the souls of demons!

Henry: welcome back

Society of Killers