Critical Analysis of Twilight Club
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posted by OCFan123
uy there! So recently I just put a Bella and Jacob article, which I really enjoyed writing, and of course sharing my opinions. Some people have sinabi they would want me to write a artikulo here about Edward Cullen, so here it is! Hope you enjoy it!
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Now, there's no way you haven't heard of him. He is currently every girls dream boy, has the most fans on fanpop when it comes to character, and alos has a cult. Everyone loves him.
But my tanong is...why?
They say he's romantic, a gentleman. Really? So what if he uses chessy lines and says stuff like "You are my life now." or "The lion fell in pag-ibig with the lamb." Nothing special about that.
Also, he abusese Bella. Your probaly saying "Thats not true! He never hit Bella!"
There is madami than physical abuse. He forces her to go to prom, takes to engine out of her car to prevent her from seeing somebody, never listens to her opinions, and always points out something wrong with her mga kaibigan and family. Sounds controlling anybody?
I reached my breaking pont with Edward in Breaking Dawn. When he asked Jacob to have sex with Bella so she can hve his baby, I realized his character couldn't get any worst. Really Edward? And how on earth was Bella actually touched sa pamamagitan ng that gesture?
And he's creppy. I mean...he watched Bella sleep without her knowledge! That isn't sexy or romantic at all...THATS CREPPY! And he actualy did stalk her...if I were Bella and found out he watched me sleep, I call the cops.
Oh, does anybody else think that some people only pag-ibig him because he's hot? What if he was ugly? I wonder...
Also, please, give him a persanality! Fun and cherry, sarcastic and funny, ANYTHING! Really, its like he has no persanality at all. He just seems so moody. Why do all these girls pag-ibig him for? Its shocking how he had 7059 fans on fanpop. If he ever gets madami fans than The O.C. and Buffy the Vampire Slayer, I think I might die. Seriously.
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Thats it! Not as good as my other 2 artikulo here, huh? Well, I tried my best. Twilighter who pag-ibig Edward, please don't attack me! I'm just sharing my opinion, which I think we all have a right to do. Sorry if I offended anyone, really
posted by KateKicksAss
I found these online, and thought they were kinda funny, :)
Credit: wiki answers, wattpad.com, b l o g s p o t.com


How many Twilighters does it take to screw on a light bulb?
I don't know, they're all too busy fighting over who gets to be Mrs Cullen

What happened when Emmett Cullen stubbed his toe?
He made the whole city collapse!

Rosalie Hale was told to find something just as or madami beautiful then herself. She came back with a mirror!

How do you stop Jacob Black from attacking you?
You pick up a stick, throw it and yell "fetch"!

How do you irritate Edward Cullen?
Buy him a dog and call it Jacob!

Why...
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A hilarious BD spoof. Jacob is hungry for Renesmee's love...and a McFlurry, :P
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added by maritina12345
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added by Mallory23
Source: http://fuckyeahtwilightsucks.tumblr.com/
I’ve read many lists pointing out Twilight “Plot Holes”, but madami often than not, the lists aren’t very valid at all. Half of them are usually just complaints, pointing out something they don’t like about Twilight (Example:” Why would Bampira go to high school?”, or “Why does Bella have so many friends?”). The rest are just factually incorrect, or can be logically theorized. These are usually followed sa pamamagitan ng “Stephenie Meyer obviously ditched history class”, or “Hasn’t Stephenie ever heard of logic?”, or my personal favorite, “I would know, I had a lesson about it...
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Contains strong language. It's not an anti video if you don't mind the lulz.
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aagh! I accidentally deleted this when I was trying to edit it. here it is again with a new title:

Bella could have gotten over Edward in New Moon and even had a real relationship with Jacob in time, but she wouldn't let herself. She felt that moving on would diminish or discredit her twu wuv with Edward and the pain she felt after he left. She wants to believe she can't get over it because she wants to believe that what they had was extraordinary, not like any other teenage romance. She wants to believe no one else in the world can relate to what she's going through. She was alone because she...
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added by Disaster
added by nuxi
Source: etsy
*Most I made up, a few I admit I saw on a video but I stated these ways in my own words so it is therefore not plagiarism*

1) Tell a fangirl that you'll send her a T-shirt with rare pictures of Edward Cullen on the front and back in two days, make sure she gets extremely excited. When the two days go by, send her a T-shirt with pics of Hagrid from Harry Potter instead.
link
2) Tell the fangirls that all gay men sparkle.
3) Tell the fangirls that the Quielete mga asong lobo have major anger management issues if they turn into beasts when they got irritable...
4) Ask them for their Twilight merchandise,...
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I think this spot and the majority of it's members have worked to ensure that when we talk about things we dislike about the series it's things we feel strongly about or have an actual point to make, not just mindless hating and that when we poke fun we try to keep an eye on the line between fun mockery and plain rudeness, even though that line can be debatable or hard to see. Still, there are some cases when I can see fans feeling left out, singled out or wanting out completely, and I don't like that. Part of the problem is something us antis can't really help with, which is that not many...
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I came across the site 'My life is average' (link) where people send in walang tiyak na layunin mga panipi such as 'Today, my friend and I bought cake mix at the store. The cashier jokingly told us to bring him back some cake. We did. MLIA."
I curiously searched Edward Cullen and some pretty much hilarious results came up!

"Today, my 12-year-old Twilight obsessed little sister told me she wanted a life sized picture of Edward Cullen to put up on her wall. Since she's always telling me how much better Twilight is than Harry Potter, I decided to get her a life sized picture of Cedric Diggory instead. MLIA"

Not the funniest one there, but i've seen some that have made me literally crease. I would recommend looking some up if you want a good laugh and hate the hype surrounding Twilight! :)
i had nothing to do absolutely nothing to do. As i was so bored i began drawing through one of Dimitri's paborito cowboy novels i had a feeling this would annoy him. suddenly i felt someone looming above me i turned around, it was Dimitri just as i thought he was going to be annoyed with me for sure.
"What are you doing Roza?" he asked
I grinned. he picked up the novel that i was drawing in i hope he didn't see it.
"Ah one of paborito books." he opened the book and saw my lovely work of art. He frowned at me.
"Busted." i laughed nervously
"Rose why are you destroying my books?" he asked sternly...
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I used to be a die-hard Twilight fan. (see my username. Damn I wish I'd chosen ANYTHING else sometimes.)

I still like the book in small doses now, and I even write fanfiction for it, but now I've looked critically at SMeyer's characters, and I think I realize what people are talking about when they say Bella sisne is a Mary Sue.

As a person who has seen it from both sides, I'd like to say that maybe Twilight fans didn't see Bella like that to begin with because she has so many "flaws".

I'm not really a mega-supporter of Bella's neediness. And I even, admittedly, wonder why she took Edward back after New Moon. Normal people with lives and better things to do would say, "Hell no am I taking you back. You left me crying in a forest, and you think I'll just come running back to you? You wanna commit suicide, go right ahead while I get the popcorn."

I still like Twilight. But maybe Bella sisne was kind of 2-Dimensional.
added by Cinders
Source: RadRad @ Fanpop
I'm just sayin' Bella is one of the worst role mga model ever when it comes to love, sex and life choices and should not have allowed to be published in any shape or form. I mean, when she's made the heroine of the story and marketted at teenage girls.

1. She's obsessively in pag-ibig with a control freak stalker.

Unfortunately it seems the vast majority of the Twilight fangirls are too with the very same freak.

2. She wants him so bad that she'll abandone everyone else she loves so that she could be with him. Even when it means she'll practically have to become a blood-drinking corpse.

(The movie 'Eclipse'...
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 Credit: Very Demotivational
Credit: Very Demotivational
I felt a compelling need to write this artikulo because recently I have found myself madami constantly thrust into situations and debates where I have to defend the Harry Potter fandom against the Twilight fandom, which I despise so much. My best friend and her family are actually major pro-Twilight fans. This past evening made me realize that there are so many reasons why Harry Potter is much madami awesome than Twilight, and its not just the obvious ones either. Thus, I give you all the evidence you will ever need to successfully pwn a Twilight tagahanga trying to bring your fandom down.

Obvious Reasons...
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 OMG she totally estola that mansanas from Adam and Eve!!!
OMG she totally stole that apple from Adam and Eve!!!
The people on this spot who know me will be aware I'm an anti, but I think a part of using this spot fairly means me not only talking when I have something against Twilight, but also fessing up when I don't think Meyer/the books/actros/etc are in the wrong. I've heard a lot about how many of Meyer's plot points are too similar to those in other vampire/fantasy stories. Well, that's never the way it's put. It's usually closer to "she totally ripped off _____. That's a stolen idea!" and I wanted to talk about why I actually disagree with most of those accusations. I say 'most of' and not 'all...
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