Is it just me or is SM into brainwashing? She has systamatically taken over the world with her books. susunod she will be Americas first ever hem hem SPARKLY PRESIDENT (no offence Barrack you rock) and twi hardiness has been taken to a whole knew level people religions such as CULLENISM yes you guys heard me cul-llen-ism.
Here is the cullenism 10 'commandments'
1.thou shalt wear ginto contact lenses-even to sleep!
2. thou shalt only drink cherryade or cranberry juice (bassically its gotta be red)
3. thou shalt not take the lords name in vain (robert pattinson) cept when you are screaming it at his public appearances and in the middle of the night when you are asleep.
4.thou shalt only eat with forks (as in.. well you all know what it symbolises.. hopefully) even sopas good luck with that.
5.thou shalt be commited to a mental hospital
6. thou shalt be a spinster forever
7.thou shalt not go to kama without pagbaba a chapter of one of our bibles
8.thou shalt be scary
9.thou shalt drink 8 galleons of water every araw because of yuour drooling over robert pattinson
10.thou shalt halik all of your twilight merchandise 300000000000000000001 times a day.
(5-10 are my own lolage)
I mean I used to be a twihard but not anymore as that is crosssing the line from sanity to insanity in a huge leap!
I mean soon there will be churches preaching the huge sack of dog vomit and they will sing hymns about how sexy and great the cullens are and they will have four bibles twilight,new moon, eclipse and Barfing dawn (sorry meant breaking dawn!)
You know the painted glass with pics of Hesus and god and all holy people that you get in churches well in the twi-church It will be the cullens and mebbe Jacob.
Iknow this sounds scary but it is true some twifans have Nawawala what little dignity and brain cells they had left in their bodies sa pamamagitan ng soing Cullenism!
but since this is turning into a book I'll leave it at that.
If you agree with me Please say why in comments and if you dont please say whay in comments
thank you
Here is the cullenism 10 'commandments'
1.thou shalt wear ginto contact lenses-even to sleep!
2. thou shalt only drink cherryade or cranberry juice (bassically its gotta be red)
3. thou shalt not take the lords name in vain (robert pattinson) cept when you are screaming it at his public appearances and in the middle of the night when you are asleep.
4.thou shalt only eat with forks (as in.. well you all know what it symbolises.. hopefully) even sopas good luck with that.
5.thou shalt be commited to a mental hospital
6. thou shalt be a spinster forever
7.thou shalt not go to kama without pagbaba a chapter of one of our bibles
8.thou shalt be scary
9.thou shalt drink 8 galleons of water every araw because of yuour drooling over robert pattinson
10.thou shalt halik all of your twilight merchandise 300000000000000000001 times a day.
(5-10 are my own lolage)
I mean I used to be a twihard but not anymore as that is crosssing the line from sanity to insanity in a huge leap!
I mean soon there will be churches preaching the huge sack of dog vomit and they will sing hymns about how sexy and great the cullens are and they will have four bibles twilight,new moon, eclipse and Barfing dawn (sorry meant breaking dawn!)
You know the painted glass with pics of Hesus and god and all holy people that you get in churches well in the twi-church It will be the cullens and mebbe Jacob.
Iknow this sounds scary but it is true some twifans have Nawawala what little dignity and brain cells they had left in their bodies sa pamamagitan ng soing Cullenism!
but since this is turning into a book I'll leave it at that.
If you agree with me Please say why in comments and if you dont please say whay in comments
thank you
There are some core things about the mythical creatures I wish Meyer would have ibingiay an actual explaination for:
Vampires
1. Turning into bats
She could have explained it as bats are attracted to vampires, but she choose not to adress it at all.
2. Sleeping in a coffin
How about that having something to do with them faking their own death or something?
3. Lack of Fangs
An evolution over time to adapt.
4. Sunlight
Related to the fact Bampira are considered to be connected to the devil.
Werewolves
1. Full-Moon
They meet at the full-moon.
2. Their Anger Issues (yes, I know that some of the mga lobo have this)
It could have been explained as a reaction to the moons phases.
3. Pack- Mind
Evolved trait or even a gift from the spirits.
Vampires
1. Turning into bats
She could have explained it as bats are attracted to vampires, but she choose not to adress it at all.
2. Sleeping in a coffin
How about that having something to do with them faking their own death or something?
3. Lack of Fangs
An evolution over time to adapt.
4. Sunlight
Related to the fact Bampira are considered to be connected to the devil.
Werewolves
1. Full-Moon
They meet at the full-moon.
2. Their Anger Issues (yes, I know that some of the mga lobo have this)
It could have been explained as a reaction to the moons phases.
3. Pack- Mind
Evolved trait or even a gift from the spirits.
Jacob: Let me call Bella.*dials Bella's number*
Operator: I am sorry. This person is talking to (Bella's voice)Edward Cullen. Please leave a message after the tone.
*tone never comes up*
Jacob: OH C'MON!
The susunod day.
Jacob: I want Bella NAO!*calls Bella*
(Answering machine): The Swans are out right now, please leave a message after the beep.
[beep never stops]
Jacob: OH C'MON!
The araw after that:
Bella: *makes a new answering machine*
Jacob: *calls*
[Machine]: Hi, its Bella. If its Jacob, stop leaving messages saying "OH C'MON!" and if your not a Cullen or my dad, don't call me. At ALL!
*beep*
Jacob: NOOOOOO!
*beep*
Jacob: ?
*beep beep beep beep*
{This phone will self destruct in 3, 2, 1}
Jacob: OH C'MON!
[Check the TS spot to see who made it, its me. So don't kill me about 'You estola this!'].
Operator: I am sorry. This person is talking to (Bella's voice)Edward Cullen. Please leave a message after the tone.
*tone never comes up*
Jacob: OH C'MON!
The susunod day.
Jacob: I want Bella NAO!*calls Bella*
(Answering machine): The Swans are out right now, please leave a message after the beep.
[beep never stops]
Jacob: OH C'MON!
The araw after that:
Bella: *makes a new answering machine*
Jacob: *calls*
[Machine]: Hi, its Bella. If its Jacob, stop leaving messages saying "OH C'MON!" and if your not a Cullen or my dad, don't call me. At ALL!
*beep*
Jacob: NOOOOOO!
*beep*
Jacob: ?
*beep beep beep beep*
{This phone will self destruct in 3, 2, 1}
Jacob: OH C'MON!
[Check the TS spot to see who made it, its me. So don't kill me about 'You estola this!'].
Created:~Alice~
Q: What to Edward and a pasko puno have in common?
A: Their balls are for decoration.
Bella: You're pale white and ice cold...I know what you are.
Edward: Say it. Say it!
Bella: Vanilla Ice Cream!
Edward: Bella...
Bella: Yes?
Edward: I just want to know how much you mean to me.
Bella: Aaw...
Edward: You know, what with me being an ancient VIRGIN vampire and everything...
Bella: Yeah?
Edward: Well, people were starting to think I was, y'know-
Bella: Gay?
Edward: ...
Edward: Old fashioned.
Bella: ...
Bella: Oh.
Q: How do you kill a brain?
A: Put it in the same room with Ms Meyer and her books and wait for two minutes.
Q: What did bella say when the shops ran low off the glitter?
A: yeeew!!! Edward you suck!!!!
Q: What to Edward and a pasko puno have in common?
A: Their balls are for decoration.
Bella: You're pale white and ice cold...I know what you are.
Edward: Say it. Say it!
Bella: Vanilla Ice Cream!
Edward: Bella...
Bella: Yes?
Edward: I just want to know how much you mean to me.
Bella: Aaw...
Edward: You know, what with me being an ancient VIRGIN vampire and everything...
Bella: Yeah?
Edward: Well, people were starting to think I was, y'know-
Bella: Gay?
Edward: ...
Edward: Old fashioned.
Bella: ...
Bella: Oh.
Q: How do you kill a brain?
A: Put it in the same room with Ms Meyer and her books and wait for two minutes.
Q: What did bella say when the shops ran low off the glitter?
A: yeeew!!! Edward you suck!!!!