"It's not that she makes him a better person, and she does, but he changes her too. Damon challenges her, surprises her. He makes her tanong her life, her beliefs...Damon is either the best thing for her, or the worst."
(Rose in 3x19)
"I'm not sorry that I met you. I'm not sorry that knowing you has made me tanong everything. That in death, you're the one that made me feel most alive. You've been a terrible person, you made all the wrong choices, and of all the choices I've made, this will prove to be the worst one, but I am not sorry that I'm in pag-ibig with you! I pag-ibig you Damon."
Compare 4x23 to 3x19 and you get a sense of just how far Delena have come. "Stefan thinks I have feelings for you," Elena somewhat unwillingly admits. "Do you?" Damon asks her. "I don't...I don't know," she stumbles. In 3x19 Elena was too afraid to admit she had feelings for Damon, and she also uses how Damon reacts whenever there's a 'bump in the road' as an excuse for why she can't go there. "It's what you do Damon, you sabotage things...you lash out." "What if I didn't?" he challenges her. "What if there was no bump?" It's taken many episodes, but they got there in the end.
In 4x23 Elena and Damon can both be honest with each other about who they are and what they want. Damon's "This is who I am, I'm not gonna change" speech would probably have scared Elena away in the past, but now she's no longer afraid of loving him. I think she has always accepted him in a way that nobody else (apart from maybe Stefan), has been able to. She hasn't condoned everything he's done sa pamamagitan ng a long shot, but she's understood that pag-ibig is essentially what drives him. She's seen him at his best and at his worst and has been able to accept they're both sides of the same coin: ("I like you now, just the way you are"). In 3x19, it's not that she can't accept Damon as he is, it's just that she's afraid of loving him, so she runs away from it, and back to Stefan. In 4x23, all the fear and doubt that's been plaguing her has gone. The excuses for why they can't be together have gone. Actually, Elena acknowledges that Damon may be 'wrong' for her, but she doesn't let that stop her.
A few people have been confused about Elena's admission that although she's not sorry for being in pag-ibig with Damon, choosing to be with him will be "the worst choice" she makes. "How can you make a choice that you know is wrong for you but not be sorry you're making it?" fans ask.
I wouldn't be too worried about this. After all, what does Damon say to her before? He admits that he's selfish: "I make bad choices that hurt you...And there's no apology in the world that encompasses all the reasons that I'm wrong for you." He's not saying "You should want to be with me because I always do the right thing." If anything, he's trying to put her off. Elena's not naive. She knows what Damon is like, and she's not going into this relationship with her eyes closed, thinking everything will be perfect and the odds won't be stacked against them, because they totally will be. I think she's sort of saying "I know who you are. I know what you're capable of. I know that I'm not making a popular choice, and loving you might be wrong, but I'm doing it anyway."
When Elena sinabi that choosing Stefan was the best choice she ever made in 4x01, she was dying. "I was coming back for you," she croaks. "I had to choose and I picked you...No matter what happens, it's the best choice I ever made." I almost choked. "The best choice?!" I thought giddily. "Elena, when you chose Stefan, your car went off the bridge and you drowned. Now you're locked up and you're about to die. How does that translate into 'the best choice you ever made'?"
Compare that scene in 4x01 to the one in 4x23. In 4x01, Elena's close to death. She and Stefan are in tears. There's a pader between them and they can't even see each other. The whole thing is just very sad. In 4x23, Delena are standing in front of a blazing fireplace, and the "I pag-ibig you" moment is one of pure joy and passion. Elena's speech is so very different from the one she makes to Matt in 3x22, when she attempts to rationalize her pag-ibig for Stefan. Now, she realises pag-ibig is something she cannot rationalize. Even when she's heard other people's reasons for why Stefan is better for her, even when admitting that Damon has been "a terrible person who made all the wrong choices" she can't hide from the truth and deny the way she feels anymore.
When Rose says that Damon is "either the best thing for her or the worst", she's talking about the fact that Damon doesn't do anything sa pamamagitan ng halves. When he loves, he loves with every fibre of his being, and when he hates, when he's angry, then he often does things he regrets because his rage blinds him. But I do not believe that Damon could ever be the worst thing for Elena, just as I never believed that Stefan was the best decision she ever made. It's not an easy decision, and I fully expect that their future will be littered with problems and danger, but you could hardly expect DE to be without those things. I'll be honest - I am a little nervous about what the writers have in store for Delena susunod season, in case they plan to do something that will destroy them, but I'm hopeful too. Before trouble strikes again, I would at least expect the writers to give DE a few episodes where they are happy for once. I'll be very disappointed if they choose to skip over that part because we've never actually seen Delena enjoying just BEING a couple, and doing normal things. I mean, they haven't even been out on an official petsa or anything yet. I'm looking pasulong to seeing that. I really hope the writers know what they're doing and aren't planning on tearing Delena to shreds the minuto S5 is off and running. fans have waited such a long time for this. I don't think I could ever forgive the producers if they put DE together only so they can fall apart. But I think they've got to end up together because if they don't, then their journey and this whole story, will have been for nothing. Delena's romance isn't a fairytale, but it is real. Far from being her worst decision, I think Elena will find that choosing Damon is the best choice she ever made.