Awww Oh, Snap! Quiz Retro Silly Whoa Yum
Questionable Dating Advice from Disney Characters
Some Disney characters are on point when it comes to relationship advice. Others not so much. Their dating tips can be questionable at best; their guidance, not so nice. It’s good to listen to people/animals/objects who are trying to help you, but may we suggest taking the below counsel with a grain (or many grains) of salt?
1. “You’ll have your looks, your pretty face, and don’t underestimate the importance of body language. Ha!” – Ursula,
Taking advice from a sea witch is never a good idea. Taking this advice from a sea witch is
2. “Well, there’s the usual things: Flowers, chocolates, promises you don’t intend to keep …” – Cogsworth,
Cogsworth is nothing if not cynical. Fortunately, Beast ignored his little clock friend and chose to give Belle a gift with a personal touch: a library, because of her love of reading.
3. “Dearest, you’ve got to stop rejecting every suitor that comes to call. The law says you must be married to a prince.” – Sultan,
The Sultan has good intentions here, but he’s valuing the law over Jasmine’s happiness. Also, he’s the Sultan … can’t he change the law?
4. “Get the fiancé out of the way and the whole thing will be fixed.” – Trolls,
The trolls are just looking out for Kristoff by trying to play matchmaker, but this tip makes us weary. (It turned out that Hans was a villain so everything worked out okay, but what if he had just been a normal dude?) If you have a friend/family member who’s engaged, you should probably not try to break up that arrangement.
5. “True love does not exist.” – King Stefan,
RUDE. King Stefan is a romantic buzzkill. True love is hard to find, and true love is rare … but it does exist!
6. “Desperate times call for desperate measures, my lord. You will order the princess to marry me.” – Jafar,
Using powers of coercion (and magic) to make someone fall in love with you has never worked in the history of mankind. Settle down, Jafar.
7. “Come on, they’re not all that impressed with conversation.” – Ursula,
Ursula could write a whole book on dating, given the amount of wisdom she bestows on her unfortunate clients. We would not recommend purchasing said book (see #1).
8. “I can’t believe you’re getting all worked up over some guy.” – Hades,
It’s okay to be excited when you’re in love! If you’re into a guy as kind and heroic as Hercules, you have full permission to be happy about it. Don’t let a Hades get you down.
9. “It’s apple pies that make the menfolks’ mouths water.” – Evil Queen,
Back off, lady. Gooseberry pies are just as popular with menfolk as apple pies, and both are equally popular with womenfolk. We see right through your scam.
What are some other Disney dating don’ts that you can think of?
Tagged as: Cogsworth, Evil Queen, Frozen, Hades, Hans, Jafar, King Stefan, Maleficent (2014), Snow White, Sultan, Ursula
Things Vanellope von Schweetz Might Say to a Disney Villain
The Disney Villains React to the Maleficent Teaser Trailer
Maleficent’s Sam Riley and Sharlto Copley Play Fairy...
Show Us Your Comic-Con Cosplay Best, Darling!
Friends Don’t Let Friends Miss Big Sales at Disney...
10 Times Disney Characters Gave Sage Relationship Advice
Get the latest Disney news, quizzes, and more fun stuff delivered straight to your inbox with the Oh My Disney Newsletter!
Disney Doppelgängers: Fierce Disney Lady Edition
12 Things You Didn’t Know About Disney•Pixar Films
Quiz: Which Character from The Lion King Said It?
7 Signs That You’re Actually Belle from Beauty and the Beast
Quiz: Which Disney Captain Should Officiate Your Wedding?
Everything We Know About Marine Biology We Learned from Finding Nemo
12 things you didn’t know about disney•pixar films
how paint the night continues the legacy of the main street electrical parade
quiz: how many of these bands have you seen live?
we went behind the scenes of teen beach 2 and here’s what happened
what to expect from the jaw-dropping world of color – celebrate!
© Disney. All Rights Reserved. Disney Lifestyle