pag-ibig is shown in many ways, whether it’s shown sa pamamagitan ng actions or sa pamamagitan ng sweet words, it’s still usually noticed. Most people in this world have that special someone, whether it’s a girlfriend/boyfriend, wife/husband, or just a friend with benefits. Everybody has someone, everybody except him. He loved, needed, and desired her, but yet, he didn’t have her. He couldn’t profess her pag-ibig for her like ordinary people do, their relationship or lack there of, was not at all like that. It was full of banter, sarcasm, and deeply hidden lust.
“I detect deviousness in your voice.”
“I wasn’t trying to hide it.”
She states, proudly.
“So, what’s on the agenda? Are we just going to stand in your room all night and have girl talk?”
“I’m going to stand in my room, you can go stand in your own place.”
“Okay.”
He states, happily, and as he hops on her bed.
“By your place, I meant your dorm.”
“I like this “place” better.”
He states, referring to her small sized bed, as he wiggles on it, getting a feel for it.
“It might be smaller, but, it’s full of comfort.”
He speaks, again. As, her eyes ipakita anger.
“Its 10:30 at night, I need to get sleep-”
“I’d be happy to help you with that.
He quickly cuts her off.
“And, I like to sleep alone.”
She finishes her statement.
“You sure you don’t want a cuddle buddy, I can be a giant teddy bear, or dog, or whatever you’re into.”
He waggles his brows.
“What are we doing?”
“Well, I thought I was trying to annoy you, and you were trying to get rid of me. But, apparently, we’re doing something else to you.”
“I mean, why are you here?”
“That’s a dumb tanong even for you, hello, look at the papers and books on your beloved desk.”
“You didn’t even help!”
She stated loudly.
“I helped in my mind, that’s all that counts!”
He matched her tone, mocking her.
“Are you ever going to leave?”
He thinks.
“Tell you what, I’ll leave if you tell me the real reason why you sucked my face off that night.”
He states, in all seriousness.
“And, then you’ll go back to your dorm?”
“I was thinking madami like the strip club on 8th Avenue, but I guess we could call it that.”
She rolls her eyes, in not so hidden frustration with him.
“I kissed you, because… I wanted to.”
The sentence just rolls off her tongue, as if she wasn’t planning on saying that.
He’s silent, and for once in his life, he’s actually Nawawala for words.
“Do I tell her the truth, or lie like I always do?”
Various tanong like this flooded his uncooperative mind.
She was staring now, noticeably so.
She quickly cleared her throat, trying to shake the lump in her throat that she had from the moment she had sinabi it.
“Looks like you got your reason, you can go now.”
She states, and smiles unsurely.
“You wanted to halik me?”
He gives a questioning look, finally coming out of his daze.
“I’m pretty sure I sinabi that.”
“Why didn’t you say it before?”
“Would it have mattered?”
She asks, confusion ipinapakita in her eyes.
“Nope, because no matter what…”
He pauses, slowly standing up, and cautiously making his way towards her.
“I still would’ve done this…”
He states quietly, as he is face to face with her now, towering over her 5’4” frame.
And, in that second, she doesn’t understand what he means, but after the third second, it dawns upon her, as his nose collides into left cheek bone, before his lips gently touch hers. This halik was better than the first, because this halik made her remember just how much she loved and needed him. It was a halik of feelings, not just of lust. And, at that moment, she knew that she would never stop loving him.
“I detect deviousness in your voice.”
“I wasn’t trying to hide it.”
She states, proudly.
“So, what’s on the agenda? Are we just going to stand in your room all night and have girl talk?”
“I’m going to stand in my room, you can go stand in your own place.”
“Okay.”
He states, happily, and as he hops on her bed.
“By your place, I meant your dorm.”
“I like this “place” better.”
He states, referring to her small sized bed, as he wiggles on it, getting a feel for it.
“It might be smaller, but, it’s full of comfort.”
He speaks, again. As, her eyes ipakita anger.
“Its 10:30 at night, I need to get sleep-”
“I’d be happy to help you with that.
He quickly cuts her off.
“And, I like to sleep alone.”
She finishes her statement.
“You sure you don’t want a cuddle buddy, I can be a giant teddy bear, or dog, or whatever you’re into.”
He waggles his brows.
“What are we doing?”
“Well, I thought I was trying to annoy you, and you were trying to get rid of me. But, apparently, we’re doing something else to you.”
“I mean, why are you here?”
“That’s a dumb tanong even for you, hello, look at the papers and books on your beloved desk.”
“You didn’t even help!”
She stated loudly.
“I helped in my mind, that’s all that counts!”
He matched her tone, mocking her.
“Are you ever going to leave?”
He thinks.
“Tell you what, I’ll leave if you tell me the real reason why you sucked my face off that night.”
He states, in all seriousness.
“And, then you’ll go back to your dorm?”
“I was thinking madami like the strip club on 8th Avenue, but I guess we could call it that.”
She rolls her eyes, in not so hidden frustration with him.
“I kissed you, because… I wanted to.”
The sentence just rolls off her tongue, as if she wasn’t planning on saying that.
He’s silent, and for once in his life, he’s actually Nawawala for words.
“Do I tell her the truth, or lie like I always do?”
Various tanong like this flooded his uncooperative mind.
She was staring now, noticeably so.
She quickly cleared her throat, trying to shake the lump in her throat that she had from the moment she had sinabi it.
“Looks like you got your reason, you can go now.”
She states, and smiles unsurely.
“You wanted to halik me?”
He gives a questioning look, finally coming out of his daze.
“I’m pretty sure I sinabi that.”
“Why didn’t you say it before?”
“Would it have mattered?”
She asks, confusion ipinapakita in her eyes.
“Nope, because no matter what…”
He pauses, slowly standing up, and cautiously making his way towards her.
“I still would’ve done this…”
He states quietly, as he is face to face with her now, towering over her 5’4” frame.
And, in that second, she doesn’t understand what he means, but after the third second, it dawns upon her, as his nose collides into left cheek bone, before his lips gently touch hers. This halik was better than the first, because this halik made her remember just how much she loved and needed him. It was a halik of feelings, not just of lust. And, at that moment, she knew that she would never stop loving him.
When does pag-ibig become something we need, rather than something we want? pag-ibig was seen as something special a long time ago. Now pag-ibig is what we are expected to have with us everyday of our lives. pag-ibig is common currency when you are a teenager, but turns to worthless pennies the older you get. Do we not care about the substance of what pag-ibig was and not what it has been made into today sa pamamagitan ng commercialisation from American pelikula and telebisyon commercials and soap operas? Only when we experience pag-ibig for real, can we comment and judge others who are in Love. pag-ibig means something different to everyone. Not two people’s feeling of pag-ibig is the same. Why do we generalize, rationalize and compartmentalize Love? pag-ibig is and will continue to be an enigma. Only a handful of people will ever unlock it and witness its true beauty and essence. The essence we all crave.
Love.
Love.