What would you do if...

Rape him. ._.

I would ask him where he purchases his supply of acid. It's obviously very potent.

I would run away and cry and hope that he dies. I would run to the police and scream at the very tuktok of my lungs to tell them that a creepy, helmet-wearing, golum-like, smelly pedophile was sitting in my closet. They'd look at me as if I were crazy and ask me confusing tanong so I'd then completely ditch them and look elsewhere for help. sa pamamagitan ng this point I'd turn on my laptop to tell someone on skype and set my status as "OMG YOU GUUUUUUUUUUYS I JUST LIKE SAW A PEDOPHILE IN MAI CLOSET #creepers :D" My friend Zander, the king of the ocean, would ask me what the balls am I talking about. I would simply tell him "CUPCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKES!" even though it does not relate to any of the past events. I'd then go to the local McDonalds to hope that the pimple-faced, redhead drive thru guy would know what to do. I'd tell him "DUUUUUUUUUUUUDE I JUST SAW A FRIGGIN' CREEPER IN MA CLOSET. WAT DA FLIP, BRO? I TOLD YOU TO KEEP YOUR MOMMA ON A LEESH!" and then I'd ask him for a whopper and he'd tell me that they only big macs so I'd be all like "Dude, us tunnel snakes rule! We must have a daily dose of awesome and you're trying to sell me a flippin' big mac." He'd then tell me "I give you a hamburger and you tell me about your troubles or I give you a hamburger and you eat the hamburger and it spills out from your corneas to become a full hamburger again only to leak through the fibers of atoms making up the ground to sink into the core of the earth where it'd burn into ashes that would essentially dance over to the planet saturn and teach the aliens of saturn about cardgames in ancient egypt used to determine if the pharaoh's icecream. ooor I give you a hamburger-" and I cut him off because he's begun to monologue and boast about the fact that he has hamburgers and I don't. I will run from Europa to North America to reach California to tell my friend Sam the past events. She would smile and say "BURN ALL THE BABIES!" as Tiny Tina is believed to say. We'd link arms to swim back to Europe. We'd walk in my room only to find the pimple-faced, redhead drive thru guy from mcdonalds dancing to carameldancen with the pedophile in my closet. Sam would start challenging the man to a battle against her pokemon cards. I'd then tell her that Pokemon cards are useless and pull out my Yu-Gi-Oh cards. I'd challenge him to a duel and he'd simply decline and switch the song to Barbie Girl. I'd slap the pimple-faced, redhead drive thru guy from Mcdonalds for having such bad taste in music because he was trying to take of barbie girl. After the susunod oras we'd all be partying to "Tunnel Snakes Rule" only to be arrested for the public disturbance. The police would realize that I was hosting the party so they'd call the FBI, SWAT, and all military forces to drop the arrest and....JOIN THE PARTAY! :3