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posted by Wolfdreamer9
1. I wish you were a door so I could slam you all day.

2. Nice legs...what time do they open?

3. Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package.

4. You've got 206 Buto in your body, want one more?

5. Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

6. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

7. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted kama Thrasher: have you seen one?

8. I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight.

9. Want to play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.

10. I wish you were a parang buriko Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride you all araw long for a quarter.

11. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.

12. I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.

13. Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway to heaven?

14. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

15. Are those real?

16. You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.

17. I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.

18. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you sa pamamagitan ng morning.

19. (Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.

20. You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.

21. You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?

2 2. F@# me if I'm wrong, but is your name sherry Titsbottom?

23. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.

24. My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.

25. Do you believe in pag-ibig at first sight or should I walk sa pamamagitan ng again?

26. Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone sinabi you were looking for me.

27. My friend wants to know if YOU think I'M cute.

28. Hi. The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.

29. My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you want to.

30. I know gatas does a body good, but DAMN, how much have you been drinking?

31. If you were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.

32. Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why? Don't you like pizza?

33. Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go tahanan without me.

34. Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I???

35. Do you wash your pants in Windex? Because I can see myself in them.

36. I Nawawala my puppy. Can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.

37. (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get you out of these wet clothes.

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*****Things Guys think Girls should know*****

We’re not as big of perverts as you think we all are.

No matter what you say, your ex-boyfriend is an asshole.

We like you to give us hugs and kisses sometimes too.

Don’t argue with us when we call you beautiful.

Don’t treat us like crap, what goes around comes around.

We know you’re pretty, that’s one of the reason’s we’re going out with
you.

Don’t go into detail about your period. It scares us. If you have cramps
and we ask you what’s wrong, just tell us it’s that time of the buwan and
nothing more.

If you really liked us for us, you...
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