-The only reason people get Nawawala in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.
-The road to success is always under construction.
-When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
-If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
-After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist sinabi something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."
-Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
-A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
-Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.
-I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The susunod day, she locked me in the cellar.
-I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places
-Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
-Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
-You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'
-Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
-One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures.
-He's so lazy that if there were work in bed, he would rather sleep on the floor
