1. When a twilight tagahanga says 'twilight rocks' say 'rocks made of twilight?'
2. Go up to a twilight fan, scream 'Bella! Bella! BELLA!!!! YOU'RE AWESOME!!!!' when they say 'I know right!' say 'Oh no I meant Bellatrix'
3. Ask them all tanong about twilight that you can think of. When they ask why say 'I'm doing a book ulat on the most boring books of the world'
4. Get all the boys and twilight haters (better for them to be Harry Potter fans) to start saying 'Edward, Edwardo, Eddibear, sparkle sparkle'
5. Say that you hate Stephanie Meyer, she's a horrible may-akda and her books make want to poke your eyes out with a pencil. Then say that pagbaba JK Rowling's books are like pagbaba books sent from heaven.
6. Tell them that people like Dracula and Voldemort are way madami famous and that they can kick Edward's ass!
7. If they tell you that Twilight are the bestselling and most popular books ever, go on Wikipedia with them, paghahanap bestselling books, scroll down and ipakita them that twilight is not there. Then go to best selling book series, scroll down, down, down, down past Harry Potter, Chronicles of Narnia, Lord of the Rings, Nancy Drew, Captain salawal etc. when you finally see twilight say 'Oh look there's twilight right there. Almost at the bottom.'
8. Tell them you went online and gave the new twilight movie one star, when they ask why say 'because Robert Pattinson was totally wearing lipstick!'
9. Remind them Edward Cullen/Jacob Black isn't real.
10. Tell a tagahanga that you'll send her a T-Shirt with Edward Cullen on both sides. After the two days go by, don't send her anything. When she comes up and asks you why, tell her because you wanted to give someone that handsome to her in person. When she gets excited, give her a T-Shirt with Hagrid on it.
11. Tell them 'real men don't sparkle' when they ask 'who sinabi that real men don't sparkle?' say 'Have you got ear problems? I sinabi Only gay men sparkle. Jeez.'
12. When they try to force you into watching twilight, try to force them into watching Harry Potter. If they say 'But I hate it!' say 'Well I hate twilight!' and when they say 'just watch it and you'll like it!' say 'No, you watch Harry Potter and you'll like it!' etc.
13. Wen they tell you they dreamed about Edward Cullen say 'oh my goodness what a nightmare!'
14. When they say the dreamed about Edward Cullen say 'well I dreamed about Voldemort, they're equally hot right?'
15. If you catch them pagbaba twilight, snatch the book, throw it in a trash can, say 'oh man I dropped it'
16. If you catch them watching a twilight movie, wait for the part that Edward or Jacob (depending on who the tagahanga likes more) take his sando off, when this part comes jump in front of the screen and scream 'FRED AND GEORGE ARE HOTTER! FRED AND GEORGE ARE HOTTER!' when the part ends walk away from the screen saying 'oh never mind'
17. When they ask 'why do you hate twilight so much?' say 'I don't hate it, I actually pag-ibig it' when they say 'really?' say 'Yeah it's my paborito part of the day. You know after the sun sits and the sky is like all purplish and all.'
18. If you find a twilight book in their bag, take it and replace it with a Harry Potter one.
19. Tell them that Edward is a "hand-me-down" because twilight got him after Harry Potter was finished with him.
20. Say that Stephenie Meyer totally estola the names Bella, Alice, James, Black and Clearwater from JK Rowling
21. listahan every power that a wizard can have and use all at once (seeing the future, pagbaba minds, etc.), that a vampire would only have one of.
22. Whenever they mention Jacob Black, innocently ask if they meant Wormtail.
23. Say that Bella sisne and Argus Filch would make such a romantic couple.
24. Flinch whenever they say Edward and tell them to say You-Know-Who
25. Explain how Twilight mga asong lobo are really Animagi, and ask whether they're registered with the Ministry of Magic.
26. Tell them they're so crazy they have to go to St. Mungo's
27. Always remind them of the Dumbledore quote 'It does no good dwell in dreams' then remind them that the idea of twilight came to Stephenie Meyer in a dream.
28. Compare Edward Cullen to Mad Eye Moody. Compare silly stuff like their hair, skin color etc. that of course are going to be similar. Then say 'how could you fall for someone who looks totally like Moody?'
29. When they remember Edward say 'Edward who?' when they say 'Edward Cullen' say 'Edward Swollen?'
30. If they say Harry Potter wears weird glasses, say 'Well at least he WEARS glasses. He doesn't sparkle like glasses. Unlike Edward Cullen over here!'
31. When they say Bella is was so brave, remind them what she did when Edward left her, then what Hermione did when Ron chose another one, then what Ginny did when Harry Left her. Compare them and then say 'Now you tell me, which one would you choose to do?'
32. Whenever they mention anything/anyone related to twilight say 'STOP BLOWING UP MY EARS!'
33. When they say they dreamed that Edward/Jacob kissed them, say 'A dementor kissed you?'
34. When they beg you enough to read twilight, say okay. Open it,start pagbaba aloud, at the end of every sentence, make fun of the sentence you read.
35. Ask them 'how come Edward Cullen is a vegetarian? I thought Bampira can't eat vegetables or fruits.'
36. Grab an empty notebook and a pencil, sit susunod to them, write Stephenie Meyer a very long hate letter, and mutter what you're Pagsulat out loud.
37. When they call on the phone and start talking about how hot is Robert Pattinson playing Edward Cullen, interrupt them and say 'Hey I just saw Daniel Radcliffe walking on my street! I'll go say hi and remind him of the stupid choice Robert made' then hang up in their face.
38. Tell them ' I heard there will be another book' when they get all excited, tell them 'You do know I mean another Harry Potter book right?'
39. Tell them Harry Potter is better than twilight, when they start to argue keep muttering 'Harry Potter Harry Potter Harry Potter. Twilight sucks Twilight sucks Twilight sucks' like crazy.
40. Tell them that you think Voldemort is prettier than Rosalie.
41. Tell them that Bampira and mga asong lobo don't exist, when they say 'Wizards don't exist either' say 'Oh yes we do!' then take a stick, point it at them and shout 'Avada Kadavra!' When it doesn't work keep on poking the stick and shouting the same words. Extra points if you poke them at least five times.
42. Tell them that JK Rowling got her book published with only one chapter while Stephenie Meyer got twilight barley published with the whole novel.
43. Tell them Hermione plays piano way better than Edward.
44. Tell them the Volturi are too stupid to walk all the way from Italy to Forks and not fly.
45. Tell them if you meet Bella you'll slap her in the face.
46. When they start talking about twilight pretend to be staring into space. After a few hours of their talking, when they finally finished say 'huh? what? Sorry I didn't hear you. I was thinking about Harry Potter'
47. When they tell you to get a life, say 'why? Edward doesn't have one'
48. When they say they pag-ibig Edward ask why, when they tell you the reason, ask why once again. Keep on asking why after everything they say.
49. Go to her room with your friends, remove all the twilight posters, pillows, kama covers etc. burn them, replace them with Harry Potter ones. Extra points of you do not get caught and she never finds out it was you who did it.
50. Buy a twilight pencil, when she says she wants it. Tell her 'okay, let me just sharpen it for you.' sharpen it until it's all gone, then say 'aw man!I'm sorry there's nothing left of it.' Extra points if she searches the trash can like crazy looking for the pencil cores.
2. Go up to a twilight fan, scream 'Bella! Bella! BELLA!!!! YOU'RE AWESOME!!!!' when they say 'I know right!' say 'Oh no I meant Bellatrix'
3. Ask them all tanong about twilight that you can think of. When they ask why say 'I'm doing a book ulat on the most boring books of the world'
4. Get all the boys and twilight haters (better for them to be Harry Potter fans) to start saying 'Edward, Edwardo, Eddibear, sparkle sparkle'
5. Say that you hate Stephanie Meyer, she's a horrible may-akda and her books make want to poke your eyes out with a pencil. Then say that pagbaba JK Rowling's books are like pagbaba books sent from heaven.
6. Tell them that people like Dracula and Voldemort are way madami famous and that they can kick Edward's ass!
7. If they tell you that Twilight are the bestselling and most popular books ever, go on Wikipedia with them, paghahanap bestselling books, scroll down and ipakita them that twilight is not there. Then go to best selling book series, scroll down, down, down, down past Harry Potter, Chronicles of Narnia, Lord of the Rings, Nancy Drew, Captain salawal etc. when you finally see twilight say 'Oh look there's twilight right there. Almost at the bottom.'
8. Tell them you went online and gave the new twilight movie one star, when they ask why say 'because Robert Pattinson was totally wearing lipstick!'
9. Remind them Edward Cullen/Jacob Black isn't real.
10. Tell a tagahanga that you'll send her a T-Shirt with Edward Cullen on both sides. After the two days go by, don't send her anything. When she comes up and asks you why, tell her because you wanted to give someone that handsome to her in person. When she gets excited, give her a T-Shirt with Hagrid on it.
11. Tell them 'real men don't sparkle' when they ask 'who sinabi that real men don't sparkle?' say 'Have you got ear problems? I sinabi Only gay men sparkle. Jeez.'
12. When they try to force you into watching twilight, try to force them into watching Harry Potter. If they say 'But I hate it!' say 'Well I hate twilight!' and when they say 'just watch it and you'll like it!' say 'No, you watch Harry Potter and you'll like it!' etc.
13. Wen they tell you they dreamed about Edward Cullen say 'oh my goodness what a nightmare!'
14. When they say the dreamed about Edward Cullen say 'well I dreamed about Voldemort, they're equally hot right?'
15. If you catch them pagbaba twilight, snatch the book, throw it in a trash can, say 'oh man I dropped it'
16. If you catch them watching a twilight movie, wait for the part that Edward or Jacob (depending on who the tagahanga likes more) take his sando off, when this part comes jump in front of the screen and scream 'FRED AND GEORGE ARE HOTTER! FRED AND GEORGE ARE HOTTER!' when the part ends walk away from the screen saying 'oh never mind'
17. When they ask 'why do you hate twilight so much?' say 'I don't hate it, I actually pag-ibig it' when they say 'really?' say 'Yeah it's my paborito part of the day. You know after the sun sits and the sky is like all purplish and all.'
18. If you find a twilight book in their bag, take it and replace it with a Harry Potter one.
19. Tell them that Edward is a "hand-me-down" because twilight got him after Harry Potter was finished with him.
20. Say that Stephenie Meyer totally estola the names Bella, Alice, James, Black and Clearwater from JK Rowling
21. listahan every power that a wizard can have and use all at once (seeing the future, pagbaba minds, etc.), that a vampire would only have one of.
22. Whenever they mention Jacob Black, innocently ask if they meant Wormtail.
23. Say that Bella sisne and Argus Filch would make such a romantic couple.
24. Flinch whenever they say Edward and tell them to say You-Know-Who
25. Explain how Twilight mga asong lobo are really Animagi, and ask whether they're registered with the Ministry of Magic.
26. Tell them they're so crazy they have to go to St. Mungo's
27. Always remind them of the Dumbledore quote 'It does no good dwell in dreams' then remind them that the idea of twilight came to Stephenie Meyer in a dream.
28. Compare Edward Cullen to Mad Eye Moody. Compare silly stuff like their hair, skin color etc. that of course are going to be similar. Then say 'how could you fall for someone who looks totally like Moody?'
29. When they remember Edward say 'Edward who?' when they say 'Edward Cullen' say 'Edward Swollen?'
30. If they say Harry Potter wears weird glasses, say 'Well at least he WEARS glasses. He doesn't sparkle like glasses. Unlike Edward Cullen over here!'
31. When they say Bella is was so brave, remind them what she did when Edward left her, then what Hermione did when Ron chose another one, then what Ginny did when Harry Left her. Compare them and then say 'Now you tell me, which one would you choose to do?'
32. Whenever they mention anything/anyone related to twilight say 'STOP BLOWING UP MY EARS!'
33. When they say they dreamed that Edward/Jacob kissed them, say 'A dementor kissed you?'
34. When they beg you enough to read twilight, say okay. Open it,start pagbaba aloud, at the end of every sentence, make fun of the sentence you read.
35. Ask them 'how come Edward Cullen is a vegetarian? I thought Bampira can't eat vegetables or fruits.'
36. Grab an empty notebook and a pencil, sit susunod to them, write Stephenie Meyer a very long hate letter, and mutter what you're Pagsulat out loud.
37. When they call on the phone and start talking about how hot is Robert Pattinson playing Edward Cullen, interrupt them and say 'Hey I just saw Daniel Radcliffe walking on my street! I'll go say hi and remind him of the stupid choice Robert made' then hang up in their face.
38. Tell them ' I heard there will be another book' when they get all excited, tell them 'You do know I mean another Harry Potter book right?'
39. Tell them Harry Potter is better than twilight, when they start to argue keep muttering 'Harry Potter Harry Potter Harry Potter. Twilight sucks Twilight sucks Twilight sucks' like crazy.
40. Tell them that you think Voldemort is prettier than Rosalie.
41. Tell them that Bampira and mga asong lobo don't exist, when they say 'Wizards don't exist either' say 'Oh yes we do!' then take a stick, point it at them and shout 'Avada Kadavra!' When it doesn't work keep on poking the stick and shouting the same words. Extra points if you poke them at least five times.
42. Tell them that JK Rowling got her book published with only one chapter while Stephenie Meyer got twilight barley published with the whole novel.
43. Tell them Hermione plays piano way better than Edward.
44. Tell them the Volturi are too stupid to walk all the way from Italy to Forks and not fly.
45. Tell them if you meet Bella you'll slap her in the face.
46. When they start talking about twilight pretend to be staring into space. After a few hours of their talking, when they finally finished say 'huh? what? Sorry I didn't hear you. I was thinking about Harry Potter'
47. When they tell you to get a life, say 'why? Edward doesn't have one'
48. When they say they pag-ibig Edward ask why, when they tell you the reason, ask why once again. Keep on asking why after everything they say.
49. Go to her room with your friends, remove all the twilight posters, pillows, kama covers etc. burn them, replace them with Harry Potter ones. Extra points of you do not get caught and she never finds out it was you who did it.
50. Buy a twilight pencil, when she says she wants it. Tell her 'okay, let me just sharpen it for you.' sharpen it until it's all gone, then say 'aw man!I'm sorry there's nothing left of it.' Extra points if she searches the trash can like crazy looking for the pencil cores.
1. Your grandpa's horse's dandruff is in the shower.
2. The raisins on the counter are crunchy.
3. You can stuff a unan with the daga balahibo on the sopa alone.
4. Your nightstand is jammed with garbage from middle school.
5. Clay dust from your old arts-and-crafts project is in your AC.
6. There are a hundred roach-sized headstones littering your cabinets.
7. Your cleaning supplies are only in your closet for show.
8. People hit the gas every time they drive down your street.
9. There's a dust bunny colony in your sheet.
10. You don't even have much of a sheet anymore.
(At least five of these are from personal experience. Pictures would be appalling here.)
2. The raisins on the counter are crunchy.
3. You can stuff a unan with the daga balahibo on the sopa alone.
4. Your nightstand is jammed with garbage from middle school.
5. Clay dust from your old arts-and-crafts project is in your AC.
6. There are a hundred roach-sized headstones littering your cabinets.
7. Your cleaning supplies are only in your closet for show.
8. People hit the gas every time they drive down your street.
9. There's a dust bunny colony in your sheet.
10. You don't even have much of a sheet anymore.
(At least five of these are from personal experience. Pictures would be appalling here.)
~ barium tetraiodomercurate
~ barium hexafluorosilicate
~ beryllium acetylacetonate
~ barium pyrovanadate
~ dichlorodifluoromethanefreon
~ trichloromethanemethyl trichloride
~ dimethylsulfoniopropionate
~ tetrahydrocannabinol
~ nitridotriphosphorous hexafluoride
~ pentafluorosulfanyldifluoroamine
~ aluminium-gallium-indium phosphide
~bismuth nitrate pentahydrate
~ tetrafluoroethylene
~ bromoisobutyric acid
~ cyclopentadienyl anion
~ acetylbutyric acid
~ butyl glyoxylate
~ hydroxypropyl acrylate
~ propyl pyruvate
~ decaprenoastaxanthin
~ barium hexafluorosilicate
~ beryllium acetylacetonate
~ barium pyrovanadate
~ dichlorodifluoromethanefreon
~ trichloromethanemethyl trichloride
~ dimethylsulfoniopropionate
~ tetrahydrocannabinol
~ nitridotriphosphorous hexafluoride
~ pentafluorosulfanyldifluoroamine
~ aluminium-gallium-indium phosphide
~bismuth nitrate pentahydrate
~ tetrafluoroethylene
~ bromoisobutyric acid
~ cyclopentadienyl anion
~ acetylbutyric acid
~ butyl glyoxylate
~ hydroxypropyl acrylate
~ propyl pyruvate
~ decaprenoastaxanthin
Just one madami time before I go
I'll let you know
And all this time I've been afraid,
Wouldn't let it show
Nobody can save me now, no
Nobody can save me now
Stars can only visible in the darkness,
Fear is ever changing and evolving
And I I I can poison these eyes
And I I I feel so alive
Nobody can save you now
The king is down
It's do or die!
Nobody can save you now
Nowhere safe
It's the battle cry
It's the battle cry
Battle cry!
Nobody can save you now
IT'S DO OR DIE
[Guitars]
Nobody can save you now
The king is down
It's do or die!
Nobody can save you now
Nowhere safe
It's the battle cry
It's the battle cry
Battle cry!
Nobody can save you now
IT'S DO OR DIE
Just one madami time before I go
I'll let you know
And all this time I've been afraid,
Wouldn't let it show
Nobody can save me now, no
Nobody can save me now
I'll let you know
And all this time I've been afraid,
Wouldn't let it show
Nobody can save me now, no
Nobody can save me now
Stars can only visible in the darkness,
Fear is ever changing and evolving
And I I I can poison these eyes
And I I I feel so alive
Nobody can save you now
The king is down
It's do or die!
Nobody can save you now
Nowhere safe
It's the battle cry
It's the battle cry
Battle cry!
Nobody can save you now
IT'S DO OR DIE
[Guitars]
Nobody can save you now
The king is down
It's do or die!
Nobody can save you now
Nowhere safe
It's the battle cry
It's the battle cry
Battle cry!
Nobody can save you now
IT'S DO OR DIE
Just one madami time before I go
I'll let you know
And all this time I've been afraid,
Wouldn't let it show
Nobody can save me now, no
Nobody can save me now
I'm back again! I'm reviewing Godzilla 2014!
Plot: Godzilla must defeat the evil MUTO, with the help of scientists and soldiers.
This movie...is one of the most pelikula of 2014! The effects were beautiful, the fights were amazing, and everything was just awesome!
Score: 5/5
Music: The score was amazing...the Shakuhachi made the atmosphere feel great!
Score: 5/5
Characters(Heroes): While I will admit that Godzilla doesn't appear til' about 45 minutos in. And the human characters are alright. Ken Watanabe plays probably the most awesome scientist ever!
Score: 4/5
Characters(Villains): The MUTOs are both amazing! Its a great display of Sexual Dimorpisim (The Male MUTO can fly, and the Female MUTO has eight legs).
Score: 4/5
Final Thoughts: If you want to start watching Godzilla movies, put this on the list!
Final Score: 18/20
Would I recommend it? YES
Plot: Godzilla must defeat the evil MUTO, with the help of scientists and soldiers.
This movie...is one of the most pelikula of 2014! The effects were beautiful, the fights were amazing, and everything was just awesome!
Score: 5/5
Music: The score was amazing...the Shakuhachi made the atmosphere feel great!
Score: 5/5
Characters(Heroes): While I will admit that Godzilla doesn't appear til' about 45 minutos in. And the human characters are alright. Ken Watanabe plays probably the most awesome scientist ever!
Score: 4/5
Characters(Villains): The MUTOs are both amazing! Its a great display of Sexual Dimorpisim (The Male MUTO can fly, and the Female MUTO has eight legs).
Score: 4/5
Final Thoughts: If you want to start watching Godzilla movies, put this on the list!
Final Score: 18/20
Would I recommend it? YES
Hi I'm back! And today I shall be reviewing Maleficent!
Plot: The evil Maleficent returns in this modern re-telling of Sleeping Beauty!
This movie should not have been called a "Re-Telling", it's completely different! Why did they make Maleficent the hero?! And the ending made no sense!
Score: 2/5
Music: Now I'll admit it, I thought the music was so-so. I liked "Once Upon a Dream" was pretty good.
Score: 3/5
Characters(Heroes): I thought that Elle Fanning was adorable as Aurora. And Brenton Thwaites was a pretty good Prince Phillip. The 3 Fairy Godparents were annoying.
Score: 3/5
Characters(Villains): I thought it was an odd choice picking Angelina Jolie to play Maleficent. The odd thing was I never felt sorry for her. She curses an infant for Godzilla's sake!
Score: 1/5
Final Thoughts: If you are into villains being shown as heroes, this movie is for you. For anyone else, no.
Final Score: 9/20
Would I recommend it? NO
Plot: The evil Maleficent returns in this modern re-telling of Sleeping Beauty!
This movie should not have been called a "Re-Telling", it's completely different! Why did they make Maleficent the hero?! And the ending made no sense!
Score: 2/5
Music: Now I'll admit it, I thought the music was so-so. I liked "Once Upon a Dream" was pretty good.
Score: 3/5
Characters(Heroes): I thought that Elle Fanning was adorable as Aurora. And Brenton Thwaites was a pretty good Prince Phillip. The 3 Fairy Godparents were annoying.
Score: 3/5
Characters(Villains): I thought it was an odd choice picking Angelina Jolie to play Maleficent. The odd thing was I never felt sorry for her. She curses an infant for Godzilla's sake!
Score: 1/5
Final Thoughts: If you are into villains being shown as heroes, this movie is for you. For anyone else, no.
Final Score: 9/20
Would I recommend it? NO
Rant 2: Geewuners!
I'm baaack!
Here's something that annoys me: Geewuners!
If you're new to the concept, Geewuners are people who are fans of trasnpormer G1 and think that everything is crap! Not all G1 fans are Geewuners, as I like G1 myself. But the difference between me and Geewuners is that I like Armada, Beast Wars, Beast Wars 2, Beast Wars Neo, Beast Machines, Robots in Disguise, Cybertron, Energon, Bayformers, Prime, and Go!
I know that they want to keep their "Nostalgia", but come on, it's not just for you. Just ask the millions of people who watch and buy Micheal Bay's Transformers.
On a different note, people should open their minds to the trasnpormer 4 Dinobots. I know they're not G1 Dinobots, but their not supposed to be!
I just think that Geewuners should open their minds to other series.
I'm baaack!
Here's something that annoys me: Geewuners!
If you're new to the concept, Geewuners are people who are fans of trasnpormer G1 and think that everything is crap! Not all G1 fans are Geewuners, as I like G1 myself. But the difference between me and Geewuners is that I like Armada, Beast Wars, Beast Wars 2, Beast Wars Neo, Beast Machines, Robots in Disguise, Cybertron, Energon, Bayformers, Prime, and Go!
I know that they want to keep their "Nostalgia", but come on, it's not just for you. Just ask the millions of people who watch and buy Micheal Bay's Transformers.
On a different note, people should open their minds to the trasnpormer 4 Dinobots. I know they're not G1 Dinobots, but their not supposed to be!
I just think that Geewuners should open their minds to other series.
Again Disney has wrapped its magical fairy hands around this tale making it two movies, when in reality this tale is quite short.
There is a young girl, who is working out in the fields. Her sandalyas falls off and a eagle (or hawk) then picks up the shoe. She chases after it leaving her family just for the shoe, which the bird drops on the kings lap. The king orders her beheaded but sees her beauty and declares her his wife, also ending in forced child birth of several sons.
(Have yet to find how she dies.)
There is a young girl, who is working out in the fields. Her sandalyas falls off and a eagle (or hawk) then picks up the shoe. She chases after it leaving her family just for the shoe, which the bird drops on the kings lap. The king orders her beheaded but sees her beauty and declares her his wife, also ending in forced child birth of several sons.
(Have yet to find how she dies.)
