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posted by DramaQueen1020
All with [x] apply to me. All of these are ridiculous and I don't agree with any of them.


1) I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.

2) I'm BLACK, so I MUST carry a gun.

3) I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.

4) I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be smart.

5) [x] I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser. (no)

6) I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.

7) I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS. (this one is VERY offensive, and hurts. My favourite singer DIED from AIDS, and he was bi, and an amazing, beautiful man)

8) I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.

9) I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.

10) [x] I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch. (no... not really, usually)

11) I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.

12) I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.

13) I'm an ATHEIST, so I MUST hate the world.

14) I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals.

15) I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.

16) I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.

17) I'm JAMAICAN so I must smoke weed.

18) I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.

19) I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.

20) [x] I TAKE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy. (kinda, but not really)

21) I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.

22) I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.

23) I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.

24) I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a apoy screaming like a savage.

25) I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.

26) [x] I live in ALASKA so I MUST live in an igloo and have a pet penguin. (no... penguins live in Antarctica)

27) I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a stuck up whore.'

28) I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.

29) I wear skirts a lot, so I MUST be a slut.

30) I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.

31) [x] I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive. (no)

32) I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.

33) [x] I'm an ACTRESS so I MUST be a conceited whore. (no... slightly vain, but no)

34) I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth.

35) I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz.

36) [x] I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend. (no)

37) I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.

38) I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.

39) I FELL IN pag-ibig WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.

40) I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.

41) [x] I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals. (um, never happened)

42) [x] I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a big peter. (WTF?)

43) I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.

44) I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin (but I am).

45) I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.

46) I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.

47) I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.

48) [x] I'm INTO THEATER ART, so I MUST be a homosexual. (nope)

49) I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.

50) [x] I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.(I am not)

51) [x] I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay. (no I'm not)

52) I HAVE BIG BOOBS, so I MUST be a whore.

53) I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.

54) I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.

55) I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool.

56) I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi.

57) [x] I hang out with GAYS, so I MUST be GAY TOO. (no, they're just my friends. Who says I can't hang out with my friends?)

58) I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.

59) I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.

60) I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.

61) [x] I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy. (nuh-uh)

62) [x] I'm HAWAIIAN, so I MUST be lazy. (Kinda, but Hawai'i's history has a lot of strong warriors)

63) I'm a STONER, so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.

64) I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy.

65) I'm BLACK, so I MUST pag-ibig watermelon, kool-aid and fried chicken. (where does this come from?)

66) I'm ASIAN, so I MUST have a small penis.

67) I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.

68) [x] I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic. (yeah... no)

69) I'm PREP, so I MUST be rich.

70) I don't like the SUN so I MUST be albino.

71) I have a lot of mga kaibigan my age and older, so I MUST pag-ibig to drink and party.

72) I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.

73) I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.

74) [x] I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone. (not everyone)

75) I hang out with teenaged drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.

76) [x] I'm CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hate gay people. (no)

77) [x] I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't. (no, we all have different talents)

78) I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.

79) I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.

80) [x] I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an overcontrolling bitch.
(kinda)

81) My hair gets GREASY alot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills. I pag-ibig Calvin and Hobbes)

82) I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.

83) [x] I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser. (no,

84) I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. so I MUST be a whore myself.

85) I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse

86) I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist

87) I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I MUST be homosexual. (well, I've put on a fake moustache several times, it was fun! But no)

88) I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.

89) I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.

90) I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.

91) [x] I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled. (a little)

92) I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.

93) [x] I am AMERICAN so I MUST be an obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant. (No!)

94) I'm WELSH so I MUST pag-ibig sheep.

95) [x] I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo. (no)

96) [x] I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent. (I know barely any Canadians with funny accents, and I don't have one myself)

97) I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.

98) [x] I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST pag-ibig hockey and beavers. (not really my thing)

99) I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.

100) I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.

101) [x] I'm a TEENAGER, so my opinion MUST not matter. (my words deserve to be heard!)

102) I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.

103) I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.

104) I'm ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and A MURDERER!

105) I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, pag-ibig tsaa and cricket, be stuck up and have bad teeth.

106) I'm a GINGER so I must have NO SOUL. (I dyed my hair reddish, and all my mga kaibigan who are ginger are great people and have feelings!)

107) I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future. (hardley)

108) [x] I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE. (no, and I barely know who they are)

109) [x] I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser. (no, me and my mga kaibigan are awesome!(

110) [x] I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a puno hugging hippie. (not a hippie exactly)

111) I have a tagahanga CHARACTER, so it MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.

112) [x] I CHAT, so I MUST be having cyber sex. (nope)

113) I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice mga sanggol and drink the blood of virgins

114) I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan

115) I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion

116) I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blonde blue-eyed lesbian.

117) I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.

118) I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.

119) [x] I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER. (no)

120) I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.

121) I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.

122) [x] I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST. (not at all)

123) I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.

124) I pag-ibig YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.

125) I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast.

126) [x] I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish. (not really)

127) I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.

128) [x] I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard. (kinda pedantic, but not a bastard)

129) I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.

130) I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.

131) I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos.

132) I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times.

133) I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.

134) I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.

135) I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.

136) I pag-ibig marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.

137) I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.

138) [x] I HATE RAP music so I MUST not fit in. (sorry rap fans. But I fit in)

139) I ilipat around A LOT so I MUST not fit in anywhere.

140) I call my mga kaibigan WIFEY so I MUST be Lesbian.

141) [x] I've NEVER been kissed so I MUST not be good enough. (no)

142) I'm a GUY so I MUST want sex ALL THE TIME.

143) [x] I support GAY RIGHTS so I must be gay myself. (quoth Daniel Radcliffe "You don't have to be gay, you just have to be human" Go Danny!)

144) I'm HOMELESS so I MUST be a dirty thief.

145) I have a major MENTAL DISORDER, so I MUST live in the asylum.

146) [x] I pag-ibig Pusa so I MUST grow up to be a crazy, lonely hoarder. (I don't plan to)

147) I chose being A MUSICIAN over college, so I MUST have my priorities mixed up.

148) I wear BAGGY PANTS so I MUST be part of a homicidal gang.

149) [x] I pag-ibig learning about Greek and Egyptian mythology so I MUST not care about my own religion. (uh... no)

150) [x] I have light skin so I MUST be 100% WHITE. (only 3/8th actually)

151) I'm a MAN so I MUST be scared of commitment.

152) I'm in a BAND, so I MUST be a perv/slut and care only about myself. (I want to be in a band, but I care about others and I'm not a perv or slut.)

153) [x] I'm ITALIAN so I MUST be in the Mafia. (no!)

154) I'm GAY, so all I must think about is SEX.

155) [x] I pag-ibig old rock bands, so I must be in pag-ibig with a member who's 40 years older than me. (lkinda, but I know there's no chance. I pag-ibig them though)

156) [x] I'm HAWAI'IAN so I MUST dance around a bonfire every night. (no, do you realize how much wood and fuel that would waste?)

157) I have an STD, so I MUST sleep with a lot of people.

158) I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.

159) [x] I'm a girl who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat. (nope)

160) [x] I'm a GIRL, so I MUST hate mice and/or snakes. (I like snakes madami than mice)

161) I'm a LIBRARIAN, so I MUST be a strict, ugly old woman who hates kids.

162) [x] I pag-ibig hugs and kisses from all my mga kaibigan so I must be bi, a slut, or both. (nooooo............)

All these stereotypes are stupid and irrational. Again, I don't agree everyone in each category has these characteristics.
If you want to, you can post what you think or what may be rue for you below. Yeah......
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posted by tokidoki123
[Family Guy] S01E05 - A Hero Sits susunod Door #178
Lois: Meg, you're a sweet, beautiful girl, he'll come around.
Meg: That's such a mom answer.
Lois: Well, have you tried ipinapakita him the goods? How's that for a mom answer?
Meg: Creepy.
Contributed sa pamamagitan ng funnytvquotes.com



[Family Guy] S03E07 - Lethal Weapons #183
Peter: Excuse me, is your refrigerator running? Because if it is, it probably runs like you - very homosexually.
Contributed sa pamamagitan ng funnytvquotes.com



[Family Guy] S03E10 - isda Out Of Water #181
Auctioner: We'll open this auction with this pair of panties confiscated from a prostitute.
Quagemire: Fifty...
continue reading...
posted by jeniffer2200
 i'm a tumor
i'm a tumor
Family guy quotes:

*Black Jesus!* "I rode this town on ass!,Yo mama's ass!" *Black Jesus*

"Meth is a hell of a drug."

"I'm a tumor,I'm a tumor...I'm a tumor!,I'm a tumor,I'am a tumor...I'am tumor! oh oh! I'M A TUMOR!"

"Pick up my poop!"

"I have the power! He-Man!"

"Giggity!"

"Luis! Luis,Luis,Luis,Luis,Mum,Mum,Mum,Mum,Mum,Mommy,Mommy,Mommy,Mommy,Mama,Mama,Mama,Mama,Ma,Ma,Ma,Ma,Ma,Mom,Mom,Mom,Mom,Mom,Mummy,Mummy,Mama!,Mama! WHAT!? HI! eheheheheh"

______________________________________________


Spongebob Quotes:

"Oh Please! I have no soul"

"Fenland!"

"I defy you puso man!!"

"I don't think Wumbo is a real word...Come'on!...
continue reading...
posted by kinga10111
A person can not fold a normal size piece of paper in half madami than 8 times.



There are just over 300 million cell phones used daily in the United States alone.



A shrimps puso is in it’s head.



Kissing is actually healthier than shaking someones hand.




Natural pearls will melt in vinegar.



An oliba puno can live up to 1500 years.



Cleopatra married two of her brothers.



Ants can’t shut their eyes.




On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament Building looks like an American flag.



Men’s shirts have the buttons on the right, while women shirts have the buttons on the left.



Chewing...
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50 walang tiyak na layunin tanong people ask

1. Are we there yet?
2. Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost overnight?
3. Which way to the emergency exit?
4. Does this make me look fat?
5. Can God make a bathtub so big He can't bathe in it?
6. Parlez-vous Français?
7. Why hasn't my check arrived yet?
8. How many fingers am I holding up?
9. Where do bad folks go when they die?
10. Why do we park on driveways and drive on freeways?
11. Who shot Mr. Burns?
12. What time is it?
13. Can I go to the bathroom?
14. May I go to the bathroom?
15. Does this hurt?
16. Will you marry me?
17. Whose fault is that?
18. I...
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posted by smileypop9
Found this on www.funny.com. I find a lot of things there that I post...


A manager at Wal-Mart had the task of hiring someone to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.
The araw came and as the four sat around the conference room table, the interviewer asked, 'What is the fastest thing you know of?'
The first man replied, 'A THOUGHT.' It just pops into your head. There's no warning.
'That's very good!' replied...
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1.His cell phone number (picture this you are on a petsa with him and she calls to ask wat time will she be home)

2.His parents-(If your mom knows his parents then be prepared to see sum embarrasing pics,of yuor boyfriend)

3. If he is a virgin!! (ppicture this your up in your room with him and she pops in when yall r about to halik and she freaks out)

4.His ex-girlfriends (if your mom knows ur boyfriend's ex girlfriends then be prepared to hear what did, tthis girl havetht my daughter didnt)

5.What his style is (your out with ur bf and mom and you turn the corner and she yells OH LOOK A THOOSE SEXY...
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 X(
X(
I bet I know what some of you are thinking, "OMG! How can someone hate their family? That's horrible, what a brat or what a b***h!"

Well, here's why :)

My mother is extremely controlling and b****es all the damn time and criticizes every little thing I do five times a freaking day! For example, I leave the door open for two minutos when I'm only getting something and going out again, and she hollers at me about how I'm wasting heat and how she's going to take my ipod or laptop for a week if I left it open again. Or when I do all of the chores she expects me to do and I do them how she'd see...
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posted by BellaCullen96
Play with your food; to add effect, act like it's a special performance for the people at the susunod table.
Turn around every thirty-seven segundos to the people at the susunod mesa and ask them if your upuan is too close, if you're talking too loud, etc.
Whenever you see someone getting up and leaving, bolt to their mesa and take the tip before the wait-person returns.
Eat REALLY loud; make disgusting noises; slurp EVERY time you take a sip of your drink.
Constantly re-adjust the positions of absolutely EVERYTHING at your table; seats, silverware, dishes, the mesa itself; and make sure to make...
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added by tanyya
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Welcome to the block, where a group of ponies that are mga kaibigan live on the same block in Ponyville. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom: *Standing in front of a house*
Tom: Something seems wrong here.
Master Sword: Why?
Tom: When we appeared, the audience was cheering, clapping, and whistling. However, I did not hear any laughter!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Thank you. The more, the merrier.
Master Sword: Who wants to hear about today's crossover parody?
Tom: Obviously, everpony. Otherwise, they wouldn't be...
continue reading...