Here are my listahan of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let you know now i got alot of these from the youtube channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything or eating anything you might spit it or something.)
#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.
#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)
#3 Why was the walis late to work?
It overswept!
#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the baya they'd be bagels.
#5 What's Michelle Obama's paborito vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)
#6 Why does the kabute have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)
#7 What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)
#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.
#9 What do you call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!
#10 How do you make an octopus giggle ten times?
You give him ten-tickles (tenticles)
#11 How do you make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!
#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!
#13 What's a chicken's paborito composer?
Bach!
#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between you and me man, something smells." (Your nose)
#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."
#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."
#17 Why can't you hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)
#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher sinabi it was a piece of cake.
#19 Why did the kamatis blush?
It saw the salad dressing.
#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)
#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)
#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.
#23 How do you know if it's raining Pusa and dogs?
You step in a poodle (puddle)
#24 How do you know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)
#25 How do you get pikachu on a bus?
You pokémon (pok 'em on)
#26 Why can't you dress with pikachu in the room?
He'll pikachu (peek at you)
#27 What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)
#28 How do get holy water?
You boil the hell out of it!
#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD
#30 Why didn't the skeleton tumawid the road?
He didn't have the guts to.
#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)
#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)
#33 What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator
#34 What's kulay-rosas and fluffy?
kulay-rosas fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
kulay-rosas fluff holding it's breath.
#35 What happens when you drink 7 coca colas?
You burp 7up
#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.
#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!
#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.
#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)
#40 what did the isda say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!
#41 Why can't you trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)
Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope you liked them. Make sure you check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
(Make sure your not drinking anything or eating anything you might spit it or something.)
#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.
#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)
#3 Why was the walis late to work?
It overswept!
#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the baya they'd be bagels.
#5 What's Michelle Obama's paborito vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)
#6 Why does the kabute have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)
#7 What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)
#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.
#9 What do you call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!
#10 How do you make an octopus giggle ten times?
You give him ten-tickles (tenticles)
#11 How do you make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!
#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!
#13 What's a chicken's paborito composer?
Bach!
#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between you and me man, something smells." (Your nose)
#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."
#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."
#17 Why can't you hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)
#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher sinabi it was a piece of cake.
#19 Why did the kamatis blush?
It saw the salad dressing.
#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)
#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)
#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.
#23 How do you know if it's raining Pusa and dogs?
You step in a poodle (puddle)
#24 How do you know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)
#25 How do you get pikachu on a bus?
You pokémon (pok 'em on)
#26 Why can't you dress with pikachu in the room?
He'll pikachu (peek at you)
#27 What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)
#28 How do get holy water?
You boil the hell out of it!
#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD
#30 Why didn't the skeleton tumawid the road?
He didn't have the guts to.
#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)
#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)
#33 What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator
#34 What's kulay-rosas and fluffy?
kulay-rosas fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
kulay-rosas fluff holding it's breath.
#35 What happens when you drink 7 coca colas?
You burp 7up
#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.
#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!
#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.
#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)
#40 what did the isda say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!
#41 Why can't you trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)
Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope you liked them. Make sure you check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
Something Beautiful
I was in a restless mood.
I tried to read and ended up with books scattered all over the floor.
I tried listening to music but all the words sounded out of tune.
I tried to write but ended up staring at a blank page for ten minutes.
So I decided to create something beautiful.
I wrote a song, drew a picture, and made a frame for it.
I took a photo, made a vase, and arranged some flowers.
I drew a tattoo on my hand, made a tower out of everything, climbed on my roof and did a dance.
But no matter how hard I try the most beautiful thing I ever created will always be you.
I was in a restless mood.
I tried to read and ended up with books scattered all over the floor.
I tried listening to music but all the words sounded out of tune.
I tried to write but ended up staring at a blank page for ten minutes.
So I decided to create something beautiful.
I wrote a song, drew a picture, and made a frame for it.
I took a photo, made a vase, and arranged some flowers.
I drew a tattoo on my hand, made a tower out of everything, climbed on my roof and did a dance.
But no matter how hard I try the most beautiful thing I ever created will always be you.
A blinding flash of white light
Lit up the sky over Gaza tonight
People running for cover
Not knowing whether they're dead or alive
They came with their tanks and their planes
With ravaging fiery flames
And nothing remains
Just a voice rising up in the smoky haze
We will not go down
In the night, without a fight
You can burn up our mosques and our homes and our schools
But our spirit will never die
We will not go down
In Gaza tonight
Women and children alike
Murdered and massacred night after night
While the so-called leaders of countries afar
Debated on who's wrong or right
But their powerless words were in vain
And the bombs fell down like acid rain
But through the tears and the blood and the pain
You can still hear that voice through the smoky haze
We will not go down
In the night, without a fight
You can burn up our mosques and our homes and our schools
But our spirit will never die
We will not go down
In Gaza tonight
Lit up the sky over Gaza tonight
People running for cover
Not knowing whether they're dead or alive
They came with their tanks and their planes
With ravaging fiery flames
And nothing remains
Just a voice rising up in the smoky haze
We will not go down
In the night, without a fight
You can burn up our mosques and our homes and our schools
But our spirit will never die
We will not go down
In Gaza tonight
Women and children alike
Murdered and massacred night after night
While the so-called leaders of countries afar
Debated on who's wrong or right
But their powerless words were in vain
And the bombs fell down like acid rain
But through the tears and the blood and the pain
You can still hear that voice through the smoky haze
We will not go down
In the night, without a fight
You can burn up our mosques and our homes and our schools
But our spirit will never die
We will not go down
In Gaza tonight
1.Buy a kids meal, and play with the toy you get on the middle of the floor.
2.Fill a medyas with pennies, and then demand all of the pagkain using the money in the sock.
3.Run through the waiting lines.
4.Buy a burger and give it to the waiter/waitress.
5.Go up to the counter, and before the waiter/waitress can say anything, say "Welcome to McDonalds. How can I take your order?"
6.Give a burnt french fry to a walang tiyak na layunin person across the room.
7.Buy something off the menu, like tacos or baked beans.
8.Go to McDonalds in your bathing suit.
9.Chew as loud as you can so everyone can hear.
10.Run inside and sing Mary Had A Little tupa at the tuktok of your lungs.
11.Eat another person's pagkain when they aren't looking.
12.Have a loud conversation with your friend about walang tiyak na layunin things, maybe even a fight (no punches though!)!
13.Rap your meal at the counter.
2.Fill a medyas with pennies, and then demand all of the pagkain using the money in the sock.
3.Run through the waiting lines.
4.Buy a burger and give it to the waiter/waitress.
5.Go up to the counter, and before the waiter/waitress can say anything, say "Welcome to McDonalds. How can I take your order?"
6.Give a burnt french fry to a walang tiyak na layunin person across the room.
7.Buy something off the menu, like tacos or baked beans.
8.Go to McDonalds in your bathing suit.
9.Chew as loud as you can so everyone can hear.
10.Run inside and sing Mary Had A Little tupa at the tuktok of your lungs.
11.Eat another person's pagkain when they aren't looking.
12.Have a loud conversation with your friend about walang tiyak na layunin things, maybe even a fight (no punches though!)!
13.Rap your meal at the counter.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY!
dora!
boots!
come on dora!
do-do-do-do-dora!
do-do-do-do-dora!
do-do-do-do-dora!
do-do-do-do-dora!
lets go!
dora dora dora the explorer!
DORA!
boots and supercool exploradora!
we need your help!
grab your backpack!
lets go!
jump in!
vamonos!
you can lead the way!
hey! hey!
do-do-dora!
do-d-dora!
swiper no swiping!
swiper no swiping! (oh man)
it;s dora the explorer!
--------------------------------------------------
dora dora
ven, ven
dora dora la exploradora
dale con el sol pequeña dora
vamos salta tu puedes niña
consulta a tu mapa
tutu dora tutu dora tutu dora
lets go
The End!
dora!
boots!
come on dora!
do-do-do-do-dora!
do-do-do-do-dora!
do-do-do-do-dora!
do-do-do-do-dora!
lets go!
dora dora dora the explorer!
DORA!
boots and supercool exploradora!
we need your help!
grab your backpack!
lets go!
jump in!
vamonos!
you can lead the way!
hey! hey!
do-do-dora!
do-d-dora!
swiper no swiping!
swiper no swiping! (oh man)
it;s dora the explorer!
--------------------------------------------------
dora dora
ven, ven
dora dora la exploradora
dale con el sol pequeña dora
vamos salta tu puedes niña
consulta a tu mapa
tutu dora tutu dora tutu dora
lets go
The End!