serye ng takip-silim ..."Twilight" sucks...

AdaLove posted on Aug 08, 2009 at 01:18PM
I was surfing,and I found a page named 10 Reasons "Twilight" sucks.It is written by a woman Christina and when I read it I was all surprised because of what she said.I know that they are anti-Twilighters but they must have really argumets not just they don`t like it and try to persuade everyone that Twilight sucks.
Pls read it and tell em what you`re goin to tell to that woman or at least what do you think `bout it.


Here we are: "Almost every morning when I come in to work here at College Times, I find a present on my desk I never asked for or wanted, usually placed there by photographer Ryan Ruiz. Among the lovely prizes I've found on my desk include a Nancy Drew video game (WTF!?), a plastic lizard on top of my computer monitor, two walkie talkies and a wheel belonging to a once-functional, now-hazardous chair.

My desk is what we in the biz call "the bitch desk." A word to my coworkers: I'm not the intern anymore!

Continuing the shenanigans, the other morning Ryan decided to place "Twilight" stickers all over my computer monitor.

Now, I've never really discussed my loathing for "Twilight" with my coworkers, but my bitterness is about to be aired publicly. Here are the top 10 reasons "Twilight" really sucks (and not in the way it intends to).

10. Despite her obvious efforts, Valley author Stephanie Meyer is simply an awful writer. I feel horrible saying it, but at this point it has been made clear to the entire world. Sadly, I think her overly simple and cliché writing is what makes the book so appealing. Cracking open a thesaurus doesn't make you a novelist.

9. These are the worst vampires in history. Rarely do main vampire Edward Cullen and his friends eat at all, despite being "vegetarian" vampires, feeding off animals instead of humans. And where did they gain this conscience? Why do they care if people die? They're vampires!

8. I want to hit Bella. Not only is the character of Bella lacking any sort of emotional depth, but she allows herself to fall into the arms of an effing vampire. Any sane person would be weary of the situation. Not only that, but she proceeds to continue a bizarre codependent relationship with him. This "I love you … but stay away from me … but come here anyway," BS that Edward pulls is just unhealthy. On that note …

7. I want to hit Edward. Mostly because he refuses to end Bella's life by finally feasting on the blood he's wanted for so long and thereby ending my misery. Go on! She's delicious.

6. Edward is sooooooooooooooooo hot! OMG! Edward is sooooo freakin' dreamy. You know how I know? Because Meyer makes hundreds of references to his beauty in the book. All the while, he lives up to being like most hot guys - completely vacant of personality. None of his creepy behavior (watching Bella as she sleeps, following her around so he can save her) would be tolerated if he weren't 100 percent supa-fine. Which leads to point number 5 …
5. Vampires sparkle! Who knew vampires were so flamboyant? Edward leads Bella to the top of a mountain, where he proceeds to take off his shirt to show her why he can't go in the sun. He's sparkly! Do you get it now Bella!? He can't go out into the sun because people will want to make handbags out of him! Despite that, Bella stares stupidly and tells him he's "beautiful." Surprise, surprise! Barf.

4. "You better hang on, spider monkey." This is the only reason I saw the movie - um, twice. The first time it was with my mom, who, like most Phoenix housewives, loves the book. The second time was with my roommate after I begged her to come see the movie with me to hear one line. Edward tells Bella to hop on his back, looking back and telling her "you better hang on, spider monkey," because he's going to fly her above the trees and stare at her among the branches.

3. The movie has ruined two of my favorite bands. Muse and Radiohead are among the likes of Linkin Park and Paramore on the soundtrack. What!? The filmmakers went so far as to edit out a potentially risky Muse lyric in their song "Supermassive Black Hole." The opening line of the song "Oh baby don't you know I suffer? Oh baby can you hear me moan?" was edited down only to the first question. Because you can only moan during sex, you know.

2. Meyer clearly thinks she's Bella. The plain, average character has five hot guys after her at any given time. Why? Because she's so virtuous and plain! Guys love that! Meyer would know.

1. Bella sucks. And she's not even a vampire. She has no problem being a "strong" little sassy pants toward her parents, but she can't walk out the door without being victimized and therefore saved by the sparkly Edward."

And also that:Written by Phoenix native Stephenie Meyer, the popularity of the young-adult series comprised of Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, and the newly-released Breaking Dawn has reached critical mass. With a Twilight film adaptation coming to theaters this winter and an opening day’s sales of 1.3 million books for her latest installment, Meyer can be left with no doubt of her success. From a first-time novelist to a mainstay on the best sellers list, she has risen through the ranks like a veritable juggernaut.

But why? To figure out why the books were inspiring legions of fans and a dozen fan-sites (including the recently hacked Twilight Lexicon), I read the books myself to see what’s what.

To put it simply, dear reader, I was horrified. Not just by the sickeningly purple prose or the lack of general writing quality, but the books themselves are insulting on every level-as a woman, as a teenager, as a literature student, and as a graduate of the Harry Potter craze. What’s worse is that so few seem to realize it.

Twilight is the story of the so-called “average” new girl Bella Swan (Ha, ha, get it? Beautiful Swan?), who finds herself as the object of not one, not two, but a total of five boys’ romantic designs (because she’s so “plain”, see?). The most important of these is the mysterious, hilariously-Byronic Edward Cullen. Bella plays the pitiful damsel in distress a few times and after 200 pages of thinly written suspense, we learn that Edward is in fact a vampire. Never fear, though, because Bella’s “Adonis-like” admirer is no Nosferatu. Instead, he and his vampire family are so-called “vegetarian” vampires, feeding off of animals instead of humans and inexplicably attending high school (during lunch periods they buy trays of food and stare at each other so that Bella can conveniently get a glimpse of Edward from across the cafeteria). The first novel deals with Bella and Edward’s romance and is capped off by a hastily tacked-on plot designed to shove Bella into the damsel in distress role yet again so that her vampire lover can save her.

Okay, you’re saying. It’s a little cheesy. But why is that so bad?

First and foremost, the books present a female heroine who can hardly take a step without needing some boy to rescue her. In fact, the books represent sexist views in almost every way-from the fact that Bella gives up her ambitions and plans for college to get married to Edward, the fact that she is portrayed as a modern Eve, begging the noble, moral gentleman for sex while he desires to preserve their virtue, the fact that their relationship is dangerously unhealthy, and finally to the fact that nearly every single female character in the book is a hopelessly negative caricature.

The series does not improve with subsequent books, either. In New Moon, Bella enters a self-described “zombie” state when Edward leaves her. In fact, the author oh-so-cleverly inserts blank pages with the months’ names as a poorly conceived plot device for showing the depths of her heroine’s pain and also to avoid having to write the “hard stuff.” Bella turns near-suicidal; she purposely puts herself in harm’s way-going so far as to jump off a cliff-to hear her lover’s imagined voice in her head.

What does this say to readers, bearing in mind that the target audience is the tragically impressionable 12-17 year old girls? That they should fall apart at the seams for months if their boyfriend leaves them? That reckless self-endangerment is okay, so long as it’s to be close to your lover? What a lovely message to send to young women.

The sole bright spot of New Moon is the lovable Jacob Black, a member of the nearby La Push reservation and newly-turned werewolf. It is in Bella’s scenes with Jacob that readers see a glimpse of actual personality, and the burgeoning romance is certainly much more true to real-life teen romances than the lofty ideals of the star cross’d lovers Edward and Bella. But add another half-forgotten plot into the mix and Edward and Bella are reunited, with Jacob left by the wayside like a kicked puppy. Pun intended.

Eclipse. It is in this tome that Edward and Bella’s relationship takes a decidedly worse turn. Edward goes so far as to remove Bella’s engine from her car to prevent her from seeing her friend, Jacob, and even has his vampire ‘sister’ kidnap her from a weekend. Bella is a little peeved at this, sure, but she writes off Edward’s atrocious behavior with the terrifying “he’s just a little overprotective” and “he does it because he loves me”. Reader, I actually felt a little sick while reading this, despite these so-called good intentions (they’re always leading to hell, remember). Not only does Meyer give her two characters an obviously unhealthy-even abusive-relationship, but she romanticizes and idealizes it, and not only with Bella and Edward, but with Bella and Jacob as well.

Jacob, in fact, gets a bizarre personality transplant (lycanthropic dissociative identity disorder, maybe?) and turns into a real asshole in this book. He actually forcibly kisses Bella-twice-while ignoring her protests and actually threatens suicide should Bella refuse him. But not once does the thought of abuse, sexism, or inequality even occur to her main character! In fact, halfway through Jacob’s forced kiss (sexual assault, mind you) Bella actually decides that she’s in love with him. What is this??

I threw down my copy of Eclipse in disgust and I was ready to forget that the books existed until the Twilight-mania began anew in the lead-up to August 2nd’s release of Breaking Dawn. I can write this article just having read the first three, I told myself. In the end, though, partly due to morbid curiosity and partly a result of wildly irrational hope that somehow Meyer would redeem herself, I gave in.

I was wrong. In Breaking Dawn, Meyer gives us an honestly bewildering and at times horrifying close to the series. The several hundred pages are filled with sickly-sweet self-indulgence and a blatant dismissal of continuity and realism. In brief, Bella and Edward get horizontal at long last (but only after they’re married, of course-we can’t have the naughty temptress taking away Edward’s 107 year-old virginity) and Bella somehow gets pregnant. Please, Meyer says, never mind the fact that all the vampires’ body fluids are replaced with their ‘venom’ or that sperm dies after three days, much less a century. Even more fantastically, the vampire/human spawn grows at an alarming rate, so fast in fact that Bella feels it “nudging” her at approximately two weeks of gestation. Now, I’ve never been pregnant but I did take health class back in high school and I’m pretty sure that there’s something wrong with that picture.

I’ll spare you the details of the rest of this horror show. Trust me, the birthing scene is something I desperately wish I could un-see (after the loosely-called ‘baby’ breaks Bella’s pelvis, spine, and ribs from the inside, Edward ends up clawing his way to a surely-unsanitary vampire version of a Caesarian section using his teeth). I’m sorry. I had to share my pain. Bella becomes a super-special vampire with super-special powers and she wins the not-conflict of the not-climax. And don’t forget her nifty ability to go hunting in a forest in a cocktail dress and heels.

Thankfully, the ‘Twilight’ series is over. Not as great is the fact that millions of girls are reading this sexist tripe without a care in the world, obsessing over the “perfect” Edward Cullen and the “hot” Jacob Black, pretending to be Bella Swan and ignoring the unhealthiness of the relationship just as successfully as the character does. What happened that two hundred years after feminist hero Elizabeth Bennet is put down on the page, we get one of the most awful excuses for a female literary hero that I’ve ever seen?

So frankly, excuse me if I bow out of the Twilight mania. I’m going to go sink my teeth into Wollstonecraft’s A Vindication of the Rights of Woman and pretend that Stephenie Meyer’s terrible series did not set gender equality back two hundred years in the minds of millions.
last edited on Aug 08, 2009 at 01:26PM

serye ng takip-silim 7 ang sumagot

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sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas AdaLove said…
hmmm
I don`t like what she said and they way she said the things she wanted,she could be kind not that rude.For someone who hasn`t read Twilight that destroys the image of the book.I know they`re anti-Twilighters but they haven`t the right to insult Meyers and Twilight
sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas AdaLove said…
Also it`s an opinion but still if it was more kind i am sure that more ppl read it
sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas EastendersRox said…
angelic
i dont really like twilight the movies are ok but she missed out the big fact that twilight copied The Vampire Diaries so i hate the fact that twilight gets all the fans its not fair.
sorry twilight fans
sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas ThePrincesTale said…
angry
^STOP SPAMMING.
You did it on another forum too, you CAN'T put a link to a totally unrelated website.
sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas moviebuff4 said…
From Urban Dictionary:

Twihard:
Stupid obsessive people (mostly teenage girls) who are "in love with fictional characters and wouldn't know a good book if it punched them in the face.

I laughed at that.
sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas emilykuru said…
mischievous
dude! this is a fanclub for twilight - not a hate club! i agree with some of ur points, but this should be posted somewhere else, like the twi vs hp spot or critical analysis of twilight?
sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas MelodyLaurel said…
Twilight's plot is actually good... I just dislike(I'm not going to say I hate) Meyer's poor writing(the use of passive voice and both past and present forms in one sentence). But I'm not going to upset you, I like Twilight too, I just wish ppl weren't so crazy about it.