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#1:
"I am honored to be the first CEO of a private corporation to become a member of the United Nations Security Council. Unfortunately, my appearance today has been clouded sa pamamagitan ng a flurry of speculation that my company is developing a weapon of mass destruction which would be capable of targeting specific ethnic groups. I want to address these allegations head on. Are we developing such a weapon? No we are not. Because we've already developed it. But with all due respect, the United Nations is a relic from a different time when nations were unique in their ability to solve the world's problems....
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#1:
"[during a robbery] Ladies and gentlemen! This is your moment! Please don't make me ruin all the great work your plastic surgeons have been doing! ON THE FLOOR! NOW!"


#2:
"I'm rich, I'm miserable.. I'm pretty average for this town"


#3:
"You twisted fuck! Your a dead man!"


#4:
"nothing.. I was just Nawawala in an old 80's movie montage"


#5:
"(sparing hostage) Forget a thousand things every dad pal... Why don't you make sure this one of them"


#6:
Jimmy De Santa: Hey, let's bounce.
Michael De Santa: Bounce? We're bouncing now? Is that what we're doing? Hesus fucking Christ.


#7:
Dr. Isiah Friedlander: Your...
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BEST OF ANDERSON:

Anderson: Please support the official release, you protestant fuckbucket.

Alucard: Well. Now that's over with. Let's go back to my place and eat my paborito cereal- (gets decapitacated)
Anderson: Now that that's over with, let's go to my place and eat my paborito cereal- (Sara's gone) AHH SON OF A PROSITION WHORE!
Anderson: Well. You know what time it is.. (Rape time)

Anderson: So what can I do for you, Father O'Mally'O'Connel'O'Carrol'O'Reilly'O'Brian'O'Sullivan... ah-who is also Italian?

Intergra: You do realise. This is a great violation of our agreement.
Anderson: Oh. And...
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#10:
Goku: Gohan. Get to the ship. If Puccalo dies. This would of been all for nothing..
Gohan: Wow. This is Serprisingly thought out for you.
Goku: (sternly) Gohan.. Where should you be wait now?
Gohan: ... This shi-
Goku: THE SHIP!!

#9:
Reditiz: (explaining what Goku is)
Goku: .. What?
Reditiz: Plus I am your brother
Goku: What?
Reditiz: You.. Fell on your head as a baby didn't you?
Goku: ... What?

#8:
Piccolo: We're here to stop the senseless slaughter of these people.
Frieza: 92..
Piccolo: This has gone on for too long. And now you must suffer.
Frieza: 355..
Piccolo: And we're the ones who will stop...
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I actually put this.. Only for it to get me suspended from the site :(


SATEN TWIST:

Sociopath: At times.

Smoking Is Cool: He loves joints of weed.

Beware the Silly Ones: Saten may be immature, sarcastic, and playful. But he can also be violent.. Especially if Derpy is being threatened.

Jerk Ass: At times
.
Not Good with Rejection: mansanas Jack broke up with him. And he ended up stalking her.

All Men Are Perverts: Saten can sometimes be considered a bit creepy when it comes to woman, often flirting with them at the LEAST appropriate of times. He says he even got a restraining order from Laura Frost.

Crazy...
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#1:
Steve Jobs (Ian): So buy the iPhone 5... OR I'LL #$%^ YOUR #$%@ AND @#$%$ YOUR @#$%!.. (smiles)

#2:
Ian: (evilly) Here you go Mom! (giggles evilly)
[Ian's Mom eats the donut and starts choking]
Ian: Die mom! (laughs)
Ian's Mom: (coughs) Just a sprinkle.
Ian: (visibly upset) But you're supposed to DIE!
[Ian starts crying]
Ian's Mom: Oh, honey, honey, you can try to kill me again later.

#3:
Anthony: So I woke up super-glued to the toilet seat. And the toilet was filled with poop. I mean FILLED, like 10 people just decided not to flush. I started gagging so I flushed the toilet... and then it started...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog

 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! Pingas!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! Pingas!

Con Mane has returned.

We begin our story in Beijing, which was violently taken over sa pamamagitan ng the koreans.

Con: *sneaks onto dock*
korean pony55: What was that?
Con: *kills pony* madami like who was that?
korean pony21: I'll be right back I just wanna get some cider.
Con: *sneaks toward warehouse*
korean pony21: *shoots at Con*
Con: *dodges bullets*
korean pony21: All units, we have an intruder in the warehouse!
Con: *pulls out gun* Where is that manifest?
korean leader: What do you need the manifest for? Grenades? We made specially designed grenades to blow...
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#1:
Woods: (catch phrase) YOU CAN'T KILL ME!!


#2:
Mason: Woods, you look like hammered shit!
Woods: Looks don't count for shit in the jungle. This is 'Nam baby!


#3:
Woods: (when Mason "player" shoots him) You do that again! I'll kill you!


#4:
Woods: Back in '64, the CIA gave up control of covert operations in South-East Asia... handed it over to the US military. From that, MAC-V-SOG was born. Now aside from being a base for the Marine Corps, Khe Sanh is our launching point for all cross-border activities. Mostly Laos and Cambodia. Missions are S&D, sabotage, black propaganda, strategic reconnaissance,...
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Been seeing it about four months now, and it's the most "quotable" series EVER...

-------------------------------------------------------------------

#1:
(live audience scene):
Peele: What I often do.. I take note of things my girl dose wrong, and call her on it at the right times.
Key: (pretending to be the girl) Jordon, why'd you leave the toilet upuan up?
Peele: asong babae WHY WAS YOU LATE LAST NIGHT, AND I DIDN'T SAY NOTHING!?


#2:
(live audience scene):
Girl in audience: (laughing too hard)
Key: Ma'am... Breath.


#3:
Key: (texting angrily) do you even WANT to hang out!?
Peele: (texting calmly) Like I said...
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#1: THE POKEMON STORY:
WE WERE WARNED. For months Rob told us there was a spirit-shattering tale of Pokemon-y wrongness out there, and we laughed at him. He sinabi it was the worst tagahanga fiction he’d seen, and we waved him off. We taunted him, begged him to fucking ipakita it. We were so innocent then. How could we know? How could we possibly prepare ourselves for the depths this story would go to?

The Pokemon story went to lengths as bad as Lara Croft and Squick, but it did it in the lovingly cutesy world of Pokemon. This, frankly, was bad enough to put it at the tuktok of the list. The things that...
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#1:
“(being attacked sa pamamagitan ng Zombie, before knowing what zombies are) STOP! LEAVE ME ALONE! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!?”


#2:
“(To Governor) YOU PEOPLE ARE ANIMALS!!"


#3:
“Thinking of the good times makes all this seem worse”


#4:
Lori: Rick, you shaking.
Rick: The past two days.. I been so focused on finding you and Carl.. I hadn’t had time… To be scared.


#5:
Carl (kills Shane): (in tears) It’s not the same as killing the dead ones Daddy.
Rick (hugs him): I never SHOULD be son.. It never should be.


#6:
“I understand what your saying Tyreese. I just watched my best friend flip out...
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I watched a few.. And just had too....


#1: CAMP NIGHTMARE:
The camp is actually a hoax set up sa pamamagitan ng the boy’s parents.. Okay, that would of been fine wait there.. But being Goosebumps, for some reason, it's so the boy can be prepared for an exploratory mission to a place called 'Earth'.. So they're aliens appearently.. Okay.. But WHY?


#2: THE BARKING GHOST:
The Aso turn out to be humans that have been transformed into dogs, so they transform Cooper and Fergie into Aso and take over their identities, then Cooper and Fergie transform them back but they accidently get transformed into squirrels or...
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THE JOKER:
Most people wouldn't considered Joker a genius.
But when you REALLY think about.. Joker is smarter than you realize.. WAY smarter.

The thing about the Joker is that he doesn't see his acts as bad OR as good.. he convinces himself, he is the only sane person in the world, perhaps with the exception of the bat. It is everyone else who hides their true selves under false masks of humanity, and make-believe tales of such delusonal ideas as love, kindness, law, and order. His whole existence is an attempt to strip these delusions away and reveal people for the selfish, depraved, chaotic...
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 R.I.P
R.I.P
#1:
Billy: Then answer the God damn question. Why the fuck haven't you gotten it back for me, friend-brother?
Johnny: One word: business. Like I told you when you were in there, or were you so busy playing holier-than-thou you started believing your own bullshit?
Billy: GET! MY! BIKE!
Johnny: What am I!? YOUR FUCKIN DOG!?


#2:
Brian: Please Johnny, I'm bagging yo-
Johnny: (points a pistol at Brian's head) SHUT UP BRIAN! For once in your life do NOT be a pussy!... (ready to pull the trigger) YOU GOTTA TAKE IT LIKE A MAN!


#3:
Johnny: I like you, Ray. Still keep your humor in the midst of an almighty...
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video
tatro
#10:
Major: Destory EVERYTHING!
Nazi: Even London bridge.
Major: Yes. Yes. London Bridge is falling down. We all know the song.
The Doktor: Zhe Holocaust Museum?
The Major: Leave zhat be. No one vill deny vhat ve did.

#9:
Alucard: Walter, do you know what my tuktok three paborito things I've killed are? Third is the Turks. segundo is Nazis. Can you guess the first?
Walter: Your father?
Alucard: (Claps) Nailed it!

#8:
Anderson: you will witness what happens what here today, and you will will speak of it later.. Except you won't. BECAUSE I'LL KILL YEAH! (dramatic laughter).

#7:
Alucard: What's wrong demigod!?...
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