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What do you think...

Of my creepy poem for english?

A THOUSAND WAYS TO DIE

A thousand ways to die
Maybe a bullet in the stomach
Or a bomb falling from oh-so-high
Or maybe to be stabbed in the eye

I watch the children play all day
Though, little do they know
Death will hardly escape their way

I watch those children grow
Those children, I know, keep memories close to them
Nieve, so nieve
They think, " I've evaded death this long. I shant die"
But little do they know

But then they start to drop like flies
One-by-one they fall, may take days, may take years
The things they kept so dear, they don't really mind
The pag-ibig they knew, the mga kaibigan they kepy
The truth, the lies told
All is fruitiless, in the eyes of death

Now all is sinabi and done,
We all lay side-by-side
Under the dirt others walk, the children are gonr
You probably think to yourself,
"when will in the dirt I lie?"
It is uncertain when or how, but I'll now clarify
There are a thousand ways to die




Any feedback?
 2dolphn97 posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas
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walang tiyak na layunin Sagot

poplove said:
I think that you are a deeply troubled person with deep,deep, cycological problems!
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posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas 
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*psychological
Shadowmarioking posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas
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oh well. i no how 2 spell it. * am just rushing my typing*
poplove posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas
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oh. lol!
poplove posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas
dracofan001 said:
OMG
DEATH POEMS= EPICNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOVES IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XD
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posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas 
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oh wow! now....that comment that i made? goes to u! *no offense*
poplove posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas
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no i have problems... A LOT of problems and yeah i probably need to see someone about that XD
dracofan001 posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas
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@dracofan0001 you're right to some extent, it is beautiful if you don't think about it too much.
Jeffersonian posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas
peppergirl30 said:
Well, I think it was good...just not my kinda poem.
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posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas 
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it is a very depresing poem....:(
poplove posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas
Jeffersonian said:
Dark, oh and it's naive not nieve but very darkly beautiful.
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posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas 
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Shit! I kept looking online for the spelling buy couldnt find it, thsnk ya :)
2dolphn97 posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas
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Welcome...since it was for English I figured you'd want the help.
Jeffersonian posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas
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Yep i kept trying to find it on spell check but than i was like what the hell! Just sxrew it lol
2dolphn97 posted sa loob ng isang taon na ang nakalipas
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