Critical Analysis of Twilight Article: Alex reads Twilight

3

posted by HecateA

On this beautiful spot of fanpop, there's a video link to "Charlie reads Twilight". Originally its "Alex read Twilight". Anyways, I checked it out.
It's this guy, he's about 20 years old I'd say, and he bought himself a copy of Twilight. He reads this on camera, making his comments, one chapter per video. And he's absolutely HILARIOUS! He points out things like odd phrases ("the sun was at the wrong place in the sky") and grammar faults. He sees little things you might not have found yourself.
The bidyo do contain a bit of swearing but other then that, they are mostly all right.

essetxoxo, TrueHufflepuff and 1 other like this

Flickerflame I've seen them before, they're hilarious. No one else really seems to point out the strange descriptions and weird reactions Bella has like that.

6

A short summary of Twilight IMHO.

posted by RobynPotter

{i did not write this myself, but i found it ridiculously funny and thought it needed to be posted here}

Book 1. Twilight:
Edward: Hey.
Bella: OMG, I'm so silly. And horny.
Edward: Yes. I'm dangerous. I sparkle.
Bella: OMG you're a vampire!
Edward: Yes. Let's go play baseball.
James: I like your girl, Edward. Gotta eat her.
Edward: Roar.
James: Omnomnom Bella.
Bella: OMG I'm screaming in agony! Yes, I will be a vampire!
Edward: I'm gonna kill you, James! I'm gonna suck Bella as well.
Jacob: Oh, hi there!
Book 2. New Moon:
Edward: Oops, gotta go.
Bella: OMG don't leave me! OMG I'm so depressed and dying in...

10

Twilight brings out the inner stupid in me & I actually ♥ it. I think.

posted by rachaelwsz

There are 5 things you need to know-

This artikulo is basically:
1. My story on how I got sucked into the Twilight Universe.
2. My life story on how Twilight has changed me. A lot.
3. A rant on why I like and hate about the series.
4. A confession on why I can't seem to get over with hating and loving it.
5. An opinion about how my life could have been without Twilight.

WARNING: Overall, this artikulo is about... why I think Twilight isn't that 'bad' after all. It's going to be lengthy. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This had me wondering for a while and to...

21

"Twilight Sucks!" - Witty? I think not.

posted by Cinders

I dislike the books, but after seeing image after image labeled "Twilight sucks", as well as comment after comment with the words, I'm beginning to see why we can be accused of being "haters."

"Sucks" is not a swear word. To say something sucks is not going to send you to hell. But it is derogatory, and immature, and does not lead to any real discussion. Well, unless some mature Twilighter comes along and say, "I see that you think Twlight sucks. Why?" That might spark discussion. But the twilighter has the upperground in that debate, considering the anti has already shown her immaturity by...

10

Twilight Jokes

posted by nessienjake

Created:~Alice~

Q: What to Edward and a pasko puno have in common?
A: Their balls are for decoration.

Bella: You're pale white and ice cold...I know what you are.
Edward: Say it. Say it!
Bella: Vanilla Ice Cream!

Edward: Bella...
Bella: Yes?
Edward: I just want to know how much you mean to me.
Bella: Aaw...
Edward: You know, what with me being an ancient VIRGIN vampire and everything...
Bella: Yeah?
Edward: Well, people were starting to think I was, y'know-
Bella: Gay?
Edward: ...
Edward: Old fashioned.
Bella: ...
Bella: Oh.

Q: How do you kill a brain?
A: Put it in the same room with Ms Meyer and her books and wait for two minutes.

Q: What did bella say when the shops ran low off the glitter?
A: yeeew!!! Edward you suck!!!!

12

Curing Involuntarily Twilight association

posted by Asvini

Whether you hate Twilight so much it fills you with a burning rage so powerful it's full extent can only be expressed through the medium of interpretive dance, or pag-ibig it so much you plan to sail out to international waters to avoid those pesky laws that prevent you from marrying a book, or perhaps even exist in the non crazy middleground between the two, overexposure can be a pain. Especially when it gets to the level where suddenly everything becomes linked to Twilight. You hear the name 'Edward', you think 'Cullen', the word 'sparkles' you think 'vampire', the words 'howler monkey' you think...

6

What Twilight Has Brought Onto The World

posted by OneFoggyNight

Yes, it's true, everyone! Twilight has changed our world in several ways!!

No longer are streets near movie theaters and bookstores safe! I haven't seen even one free from screaming fangirls (and yes, screaming fanboys) when the new pelikula come out and even after it's all been done for about a buwan or so. Yeah, there are still girls running around in "I <3 guys that sparkle" t-shirts carring on about how great the twilight movie was at the movie theater in my town.

The world now has fewer trees than ever before, just because there where over millions of pieces of paper used for the twilight...

14

My C.A.T Family (what boredom can do to you)

posted by Myf_1992

As the pamagat suggests out of boredom I made a family out of the kittehs here who I talk to most, giving kittehs roles within the family from how I view them.

God:
The God of the family is Bastet, She is mighty and furry, and I give Her daily offerings of cream, catnip and balls of yarn. All hail Her Glorious Fluffiness.

MomCat:
Everyone knows who MomCat is(if you don't its DearHeart), she's loving and kind and nurturing. She keeps us in line and makes sure RenCat(renrae) hasn't had too many blue Smarties.

GodCats (AuntieCats and GodMotherCats didn't sound right):
These two I view as funny and kind...

12

imterveiw with a twihard

posted by kayleebabee

this is a study i have conducted to ask what is the big deal weith twilight and edward cullen I asked my littlesister tasha what she thought of the global phenomenon that has all the worlds women gripped in an edward cullen orgasm.

Me: why do you think Edward Cullen is *shudders violently* hot?
Tasha: (I have made her sagot sound like she has n intellectual brain cell through hours of trranslating twilight gibberish) I think it is mostly because he is unnatainable and perfect.
(what she actually sinabi was: squeeeeeeee edward cullen i want him but cant have him because that asong babae bella is his...

9

walang tiyak na layunin little rant on Bella.

posted by monLOVEbrucas

Bella Sawn.... Hmmm.

If my bestfreind has loved me, kissed me, tried to ruin my relationship with my boyfriend, i wouldn't be all cool with him loving my child.... including because she's young and his old.
Bella didn't react properly.
I wanted her to get really mad, i wanted Jacob to be banned from seeing Nessie, not have 10 minutos go by, and his aloud to hold her again.

They say you dont choose love, pag-ibig choose's you.
I believe in that but Reneseme, didn't get a choice? Somehow this imprinting thing assumes the person the wolfs are going to fall inlove with are going to pag-ibig them back?

In twilight saga this is the thing i do not understand or get no matter how much i try...
and I just felt the need to let that out LOL even though i have so much madami i would like to let out.

20

Why Can't I Stop Visiting the C.A.T. Spot?

posted by laureng114

Ever since its kamakailan creation I have not been able to stop visiting this spot (Not that it's a problem...haha). I decided to sit down and ponder and from my pondering came this list.

1. Everybody rates EVERYTHING.
I mean EVERYTHING. Nothing goes unrated and everyone always rates fairly.

2. The Forums are always buzzing.
I absolutely pag-ibig visiting the forums. Someone is always there looking to chat and the comments are sure to put a smile on my face.

3. I can have intelligent and enjoyable conversations
I don't feel like I talk to someone and all they have to say is, "OMG you pag-ibig (insert...

19

Twilight... The Right Way

posted by xxXsk8trXxx

This artikulo may be offencive to a lot of Twihards. Viewer disgrettion is advised

Edward: Bella,I'm dangerous, stay away.
Bella: But Edward, I pag-ibig you!
Edward: Me too, but I'm dangerous, so you have to stay away from me
Bella: But Edward, you're the pag-ibig of my life! We have to be together!
Edward: Fear me and my sparkiling skin! *takes off shirt*
Bella: Wait a second, you sparkle?
Edward: Isn't it frightening?
Bella: No. Sorry to break it to ya Edward, but it's gay
Edward: I kissed Emmet one time...
Bella: How old are you?
Edward: 100
Bella: Eeew! Aren't there laws about 100 taon olds and 17 taon olds...

54

6 ways Twilight improved the world (for people who hate it)

posted by Asvini

Some of these are intended to be jokey, some are intended to be serious, none are intended to offend :)

1. It helps focus 'recreational hate' into one convenient area. What I consider to be recreational hate is hate that has no real purpose, like an annoying unintentional hobby. Like it's useful hate to hate injustice or animal cruelty, it's recreational hate to hate Paris Hilton or the fact that Sienna Miller is considered a style icon despite the fact that I've never seen her in an outfit that didn't look like she was talked into wearing it sa pamamagitan ng a stylist who secretly hates her guts. Thing...

19

Another ridiculous rant...

posted by AliceHaleCullen

I have noticed, that on the Twilight Series spot if a certain person adds decent content when a certain person is online, it gets rated very low. As much as I am a tagahanga of Twilight, it makes me wonder what it's all about anymore.

It shows how ridiculous the fanbase for it really is when people get bullied and bashed for having an opinion, or adding good content at the wrong time because they don't like the person who has added it.

I'm sure i'm not the first person to mention this, but it has recently caught my attention alot. Spam uploaders who add thousandsof pictures ask everyone to rate there...

10

Team ____________

added by Jasper_LUVER

Source: Google

4

It's finally happened: A vampire book worse than Twilight (spoilers)

posted by classicalexpert

It's called "Daughter of Darkness" sa pamamagitan ng V.C. Andrews.

This book was just aweful. It's about a 17 taon old vampire girl named Lorelie Patio (Mary Sue alert!) whos only purpose in life is to be her Daddy's sex slave. This book is filled with shallow evaluations of beauty, anti feminism, poor morals, and disgusting turn of events.

Lorelie has three sisters who are manipulated and emotionally abused sa pamamagitan ng their father. The worst thing about it is that it's never seen as a bad thing. It's disguised as fatherly love. None of the characters recognize the manipulation or abuse. You have to read between the...

Good Job! But is it your job to explain?

posted by RonGetYourWand

This is under 'opinion' so please don't send any hate, it's just a though I had.

I have read various explainations both on this site and others about things antis point out as plot holes. (Ex: Renessme, Imprinting, Vampire Transformation, ect.) And I think that it's great that some people do think it through and don't just take it because it is what was written. What I don't understand is why you should have too.

In my mind, when an may-akda creates a story with a new or different breed of creature they should explain it atleast to some degree.

I'm not saying she needs to explain every little thing,...

5

100 Reasons why Twilight Suck

posted by XxGigglesxX

1. Twilight is the product of an immature writer. It reads like something out of my notebook from freshman year.
2. The only difference between Twilight and fanfiction.net is marginally better grammar.
3. And even that isn’t so great sometimes. English major fail.
4. I’ve read fanfiction that is lightyears better than Twitripe.
5. The prose is purple amethyst! Deep, luscious, dazzling amethyst that scintillates and glitters incandescently in the sun!
6. Not to mention, it’s also insanely repetitive.
7. THESAURUS ABUSE! Fancy words are not necessarily better words.
8. The storyline is trite and...