I was once in the pit of all darkness...
Where all my fears and anything and everything didn't matter.... where nothing helped.
No love.
No help.
No one cared.
At least... thats how it felt...
No one noticed because of the mask, the mask everyone see's...

I felt like everyone would either be better off if I just DIED or might even throw a party!
Ha! I used to think thats what they all wanted they just acted nice.
I felt I didn't deserve there kindess.
Thats what I 'thought'.
Every night crying my self asleep,
every night thinking of how to kill my self,
every night praying...

praying God would kill...