Roman: (meets Niko at the bangka stop).
Niko: (stressed) What took you so long!
Roman: Sorry.. I was at a party.. But anyway.. (singing) Welcome, home, Cousin. You know that, I missed ye-
Niko: [Off-Screen] NO! [On-Screen] NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR YOU SING!
---------------------------------------------------------------
Roman: Do you think Mallorie's mad at me?
Niko: Because you're in the right lane behind a bus and you won't go around it? (sarcastically) No, I'm sure she finds it charming.
Roman: No, because I didn't invite her to come you with me.
Niko: I'm starting to think she dodged a bullet.. The slowest bullet in the world!.
Roman: Calm down Niko.. I thought you had your anger issues under control?
Niko: What are you talking about. I don't have anger issu- (suddenly enraged) OH MY GOD ROMAN! YOU DID "NOT" HAVE TO SLOW DOWN FOR A BIRD!.. YOU KNOW THEY FLY RIGHT!?
------------------------------------------------------------
Roman: That's right. I got the best cockroaches, I got the best dirt!
Niko: SHUT UP! (angrily punches hole into the wall).
Roman: (sarcastically) Oh, yeah, I guess I'm okay with you destroying my property.
------------------------------------------------------------
Raman: But anyway.. But here, all I needed was one good guy. One good guy, I could do well. Not take over the world, but do oka-
Niko: (angrily after looking in the fridge) WHERE'S THE FUCKIN MILK!?
Roman: I don't have any-
Niko: (enraged) Then go out and FUCKIN sa pamamagitan ng SOME!
Roman: (scared) Okay, okay! (runs out the door).
SOON AFTER:
Roman: (gives Niko gatas container) You happy now?
Niko: (happily) I'm VERY happy now.
------------------------------------------------------------
Niko: Fine., During the war. We did some bad things and bad things happened to us. War is where the young and stupid are tricked sa pamamagitan ng the old and mapait into killing each other. I was very young, and very angry. Maybe that is no excuse... Roman?
Niko: (violently pounds table) ROMAN!.. Are you sleeping you FAT FUCK!?
Roman: I'm sorry I-
Niko: FUCK YOU ROMAN!... Fuck!... Fuck someone!... Fuck a tit!... Fuck a tit hard!... For the pag-ibig of Alan greenspan... FUCK!
Roman: ... Feel better?
Niko: ... (sighs) not really.
------------------------------------------------------------
Dardan: Fuck you! (tries to stab Niko, who dodge it)
Niko: (breaks his arm).
Dardan Oh my arm. Oh!
Niko: (mockingly) Ohh, was that your arm?
Dardan: Fuck you!
------------------------------------------------------------
Niko: I'm sorry!
Roman: SCREW YOU!
Niko: Look, it wasn't my business.. I thought you were okay with it!
Roman: Well clearly I'm not!
Niko: Well.. Go after him then. (opens friddge) Cause I'm not getting involv- Wait, what happened to my kit-kat bar I left in here?
Roman: Vlad must of took it.
Niko: (enraged) THE MOTHER FUCKER!
Roman: Whoa man, calm dow-
Niko: (finds and cocks a bomba action shotgun) I'LL KILL HIM! (runs out towards the car, holding the shotgun).
Roman: Wait Niko. Don't do anything too craz- Wait for me!
------------------------------------------------------------
Niko: Keep away from Mr Faustin's daughter.
Mason: Fuck you! This ain't Russia! And we ain't communists!
Niko: Why dose everybody think I'm Russian?
Daughter: Tell my dad! I can see whoever I want..
Mason: I will get the brothers. And we're kick your as- (gets shot in the face, and dies).
Niko: (holding handgun).
Daughter: YOU KILLED HIM!
Niko: Yes. That's why I'm here… What did you expect.. Me to chase him down on a bike and fight him and other bike members.. No thank you.
------------------------------------------------------------
Roman: (on phone) Cousin, let's go bowling.
Niko: Not know Roman.
Roman: (on phone) Strip club than?
Niko: You know I don't care for that shit cousin.
Roman: (on phone) but they got Lindsay Lohan now.
Niko: ... Really?
Roman: (on phone) yeah. And she shows EVERYTHING!
Niko: Oh god! That is so fuckin hot!
Roman: (on phone) I know right.
Niko: What about Paris Hilton?... I mean.. She's a idiot. But she's got an rockin bod!
------------------------------------------------------------
Packie and Derrick dramatically burst out of the bank, firing at the cops.
The scream moments from KORN - GET THIS PARTY STARTED fill the background).
Packie: (annoyed) Niko! Turn off the music! I can't concentrate.
Niko: (holding a CD player that's playing the Korn song), But it's setting the mood!
------------------------------------------------------------
Niko: (walks past Johnny, on his way to save Roman) uy Johnny.
Johnny: (dialing phone) uy Niko.
Niko: (goes into the warehouse, and pulls out gun).
------------------------------------------------------------
Ray: (gets shot in the face and dies)
Niko: (holding desert eagle) HA! I shot your face!.. Take that faceless!... Serves you right for thinking I'm not going to lie down for some frat boy bastard with his damn henley, smoking his sticky buds out of a soda can while watching his paborito downloaded Simpson episodes every night! Yes, we all pag-ibig Mr. Plow. Oh, you've got the song memorized, do you? SO DOES EVERYONE ELSE!
(20 minutos later)
Niko: (still talking) That is exactly the kind of idiot you see at taco kampanilya at one in the morning... the guy who just whiffed his way down the bar-skank ladder. If he wants to throw hands, I'll throw hands! I tell you...
------------------------------------------------------------
Niko: And that's why I need you
Dash: (outside Packie's house).. But never sinabi anything.. You came over, knocked on my door. and sinabi "and that's why I need you".
------------------------------------------------------------
Dimitri: Fuck you Bellic!
Niko: No fuck YOU Dimitri!.. I KNEW it was a mistake to work with you!.. But I DID... I promised Roman to start forgiving.. And now you took him!... I FUCKIN HATE YOU!
Dimitri: (a bit annoyed) Yes! I am aware of that.
Niko: I have madami respect for the shit I invaded my toilet with, than I for you. I'm surprised ANYBODYnlikes you for all you do.. Your a cruel, ugly, annoying-
20 minutos later
Niko: (still talking as he chases after Dimitri on the roof) over confident, backstabbing, son of a bitch!... And when I find you! swear I am gonna I will rip out your eyes, jab them down your throat and have you watch as I slowly rip each body part off and cut them into bite sized pieces and tha-
5 hours later:
Niko: (still talking as he chases after Dimitri on the boat) And when it's finally all done, I will cut off your head and place it over my fireplace, as a constant reminder of what a cold hearted FUCK looks like!.. and this WILL happen, I will hunt you down and-
2 hours later:
Niko: (still talking as he's getting on Jacob's helicopter) And than.. And only than, would I be able to ilipat on!
------------------------------------------------------------
Niko: (approaches) Welcome to America.
Dimitri: (translated) Screw you... You dick.
Niko: Yeah well.. Kill my cousin.. And this is what happens. (shoves a grenade down Dimitri's throat and walks away as it goes off, pieces of Dimitri flying all over the place).
Niko: (stressed) What took you so long!
Roman: Sorry.. I was at a party.. But anyway.. (singing) Welcome, home, Cousin. You know that, I missed ye-
Niko: [Off-Screen] NO! [On-Screen] NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR YOU SING!
---------------------------------------------------------------
Roman: Do you think Mallorie's mad at me?
Niko: Because you're in the right lane behind a bus and you won't go around it? (sarcastically) No, I'm sure she finds it charming.
Roman: No, because I didn't invite her to come you with me.
Niko: I'm starting to think she dodged a bullet.. The slowest bullet in the world!.
Roman: Calm down Niko.. I thought you had your anger issues under control?
Niko: What are you talking about. I don't have anger issu- (suddenly enraged) OH MY GOD ROMAN! YOU DID "NOT" HAVE TO SLOW DOWN FOR A BIRD!.. YOU KNOW THEY FLY RIGHT!?
------------------------------------------------------------
Roman: That's right. I got the best cockroaches, I got the best dirt!
Niko: SHUT UP! (angrily punches hole into the wall).
Roman: (sarcastically) Oh, yeah, I guess I'm okay with you destroying my property.
------------------------------------------------------------
Raman: But anyway.. But here, all I needed was one good guy. One good guy, I could do well. Not take over the world, but do oka-
Niko: (angrily after looking in the fridge) WHERE'S THE FUCKIN MILK!?
Roman: I don't have any-
Niko: (enraged) Then go out and FUCKIN sa pamamagitan ng SOME!
Roman: (scared) Okay, okay! (runs out the door).
SOON AFTER:
Roman: (gives Niko gatas container) You happy now?
Niko: (happily) I'm VERY happy now.
------------------------------------------------------------
Niko: Fine., During the war. We did some bad things and bad things happened to us. War is where the young and stupid are tricked sa pamamagitan ng the old and mapait into killing each other. I was very young, and very angry. Maybe that is no excuse... Roman?
Niko: (violently pounds table) ROMAN!.. Are you sleeping you FAT FUCK!?
Roman: I'm sorry I-
Niko: FUCK YOU ROMAN!... Fuck!... Fuck someone!... Fuck a tit!... Fuck a tit hard!... For the pag-ibig of Alan greenspan... FUCK!
Roman: ... Feel better?
Niko: ... (sighs) not really.
------------------------------------------------------------
Dardan: Fuck you! (tries to stab Niko, who dodge it)
Niko: (breaks his arm).
Dardan Oh my arm. Oh!
Niko: (mockingly) Ohh, was that your arm?
Dardan: Fuck you!
------------------------------------------------------------
Niko: I'm sorry!
Roman: SCREW YOU!
Niko: Look, it wasn't my business.. I thought you were okay with it!
Roman: Well clearly I'm not!
Niko: Well.. Go after him then. (opens friddge) Cause I'm not getting involv- Wait, what happened to my kit-kat bar I left in here?
Roman: Vlad must of took it.
Niko: (enraged) THE MOTHER FUCKER!
Roman: Whoa man, calm dow-
Niko: (finds and cocks a bomba action shotgun) I'LL KILL HIM! (runs out towards the car, holding the shotgun).
Roman: Wait Niko. Don't do anything too craz- Wait for me!
------------------------------------------------------------
Niko: Keep away from Mr Faustin's daughter.
Mason: Fuck you! This ain't Russia! And we ain't communists!
Niko: Why dose everybody think I'm Russian?
Daughter: Tell my dad! I can see whoever I want..
Mason: I will get the brothers. And we're kick your as- (gets shot in the face, and dies).
Niko: (holding handgun).
Daughter: YOU KILLED HIM!
Niko: Yes. That's why I'm here… What did you expect.. Me to chase him down on a bike and fight him and other bike members.. No thank you.
------------------------------------------------------------
Roman: (on phone) Cousin, let's go bowling.
Niko: Not know Roman.
Roman: (on phone) Strip club than?
Niko: You know I don't care for that shit cousin.
Roman: (on phone) but they got Lindsay Lohan now.
Niko: ... Really?
Roman: (on phone) yeah. And she shows EVERYTHING!
Niko: Oh god! That is so fuckin hot!
Roman: (on phone) I know right.
Niko: What about Paris Hilton?... I mean.. She's a idiot. But she's got an rockin bod!
------------------------------------------------------------
Packie and Derrick dramatically burst out of the bank, firing at the cops.
The scream moments from KORN - GET THIS PARTY STARTED fill the background).
Packie: (annoyed) Niko! Turn off the music! I can't concentrate.
Niko: (holding a CD player that's playing the Korn song), But it's setting the mood!
------------------------------------------------------------
Niko: (walks past Johnny, on his way to save Roman) uy Johnny.
Johnny: (dialing phone) uy Niko.
Niko: (goes into the warehouse, and pulls out gun).
------------------------------------------------------------
Ray: (gets shot in the face and dies)
Niko: (holding desert eagle) HA! I shot your face!.. Take that faceless!... Serves you right for thinking I'm not going to lie down for some frat boy bastard with his damn henley, smoking his sticky buds out of a soda can while watching his paborito downloaded Simpson episodes every night! Yes, we all pag-ibig Mr. Plow. Oh, you've got the song memorized, do you? SO DOES EVERYONE ELSE!
(20 minutos later)
Niko: (still talking) That is exactly the kind of idiot you see at taco kampanilya at one in the morning... the guy who just whiffed his way down the bar-skank ladder. If he wants to throw hands, I'll throw hands! I tell you...
------------------------------------------------------------
Niko: And that's why I need you
Dash: (outside Packie's house).. But never sinabi anything.. You came over, knocked on my door. and sinabi "and that's why I need you".
------------------------------------------------------------
Dimitri: Fuck you Bellic!
Niko: No fuck YOU Dimitri!.. I KNEW it was a mistake to work with you!.. But I DID... I promised Roman to start forgiving.. And now you took him!... I FUCKIN HATE YOU!
Dimitri: (a bit annoyed) Yes! I am aware of that.
Niko: I have madami respect for the shit I invaded my toilet with, than I for you. I'm surprised ANYBODYnlikes you for all you do.. Your a cruel, ugly, annoying-
20 minutos later
Niko: (still talking as he chases after Dimitri on the roof) over confident, backstabbing, son of a bitch!... And when I find you! swear I am gonna I will rip out your eyes, jab them down your throat and have you watch as I slowly rip each body part off and cut them into bite sized pieces and tha-
5 hours later:
Niko: (still talking as he chases after Dimitri on the boat) And when it's finally all done, I will cut off your head and place it over my fireplace, as a constant reminder of what a cold hearted FUCK looks like!.. and this WILL happen, I will hunt you down and-
2 hours later:
Niko: (still talking as he's getting on Jacob's helicopter) And than.. And only than, would I be able to ilipat on!
------------------------------------------------------------
Niko: (approaches) Welcome to America.
Dimitri: (translated) Screw you... You dick.
Niko: Yeah well.. Kill my cousin.. And this is what happens. (shoves a grenade down Dimitri's throat and walks away as it goes off, pieces of Dimitri flying all over the place).
