A Million pag-ibig Songs Later

A/N: Right I'm in such madami of a Pagsulat mood today so I finished this all today. I'm so sorry for going on and on, on the last chapter but someone nagkomento saying that I was saying it was crap for reverse psychology so to get sympathy- I didn't. I really feel my Pagsulat isn't that strong anymore or ever was so I'm just explaining myself to my loyal readers. So anyway I hope you enjoy this chapter, but I know the majority or all of you will not, but please do still comment all the same. Thank you xoxo.


Chapter 20: Run away. Fly away. Hide

        Nate grinned at them both, just as Blair noticed Nate was standing right in front of her and she was holding onto Chuck's hand she pulled away but it made no difference. Nate started shaking his head and tutting with sarcastic laughter. The first thing Chuck did when he saw Nate standing in front of him was take a few steps back. He didn't want another fight or especially another manuntok to his already fragile nose.
“Nate...”
Blair said, swiftly and quietly as she let go of Chuck's hand.
“Nate!”
Chuck also said, speaking louder than Blair did. He seemed surprised that Nate had returned
“Save it Chuck. I need to talk to Blair. Alone”
Nate snapped and took a few steps closer to them both.
“Sure. Of course”
Blair nodded along smiling thinking there was hope after all.
“No, I'm staying”
Chuck took a step in between Nate and Blair.
“Chuck just go. Please...”
Blair placed her hand on his shoulder and pushed him from her view of Nate.
“I'm coming back later”
Chuck saw Blair gazing into his eyes and without even saying a word he knew he had to leave them to sort things out.
“Oh don't let me stop you”
Nate muttered as Chuck walked into the elevator and left them too sort out their engagement or non-engagement.
        Nate walked into their apartment and Blair started pleading her innocence as soon as he set foot in the door.
“I didn't call him here, he just showed up. I don't know why...”
“Don't care, you two can sail off into the sunset as far as I'm concerned”
Nate rolled his eyes tired of Blair's denial.
“I didn't call him”
She mumbled.
“Blair I'm giving you the chance here, I know you don't pag-ibig me. I don't know if you ever did”
“Of course I did!”
Which was true. She did pag-ibig him, she had loved him in high school and she had fallen in pag-ibig with him again in later life but finally saying that got it through to her head that didn't anymore.
“That can be debated but I just wanted to say, it was nice while it lasted”
Nate stopped with the sarcasm and the eye rolling he genuinely meant those words.
“You're finishing us?”
She asked but knowing the answer, it was a rhetorical tanong in her mind.
“You finished us”
Nate answered all the same.
“There's nothing I can do?”
She knew she couldn't not that she wanted too anymore but she couldn't sound like she was giving up too easily.
“No. I'll come get my stuff later in the week”
“No, this is your apartment I'll leave”
Blair shook her head and moved closer to the door.
“You gave up pretty fast”
Nate laughed under his breath.
“Is there any point fighting a losing battle?” Blair asked as Nate just gazed down at the floor, waiting for her susunod words. “I'll go stay with Serena tonight”
“All right”
He nodded.
“Nate I really am sorry...”
“I've heard it Blair”
“No I mean I'm really sorry, you deserve someone who loves you madami than anything in the world, you deserve better than me. I hope you find it”
She wished Nate all the best, like it would be the last time she would see him of course it wouldn't but she felt like this would be the only time to say it.
Just as she left Nate actually felt a great weight had been lifted, he wouldn't have to worry about losing Blair too Chuck doing their marriage anymore, he wouldn't have to be insecure, he wouldn't have to worry where she was every segundo of every day. He could be free. Alone free, but it was a start of a new chapter for Nate. This one would never be read again.
        Blair left the apartment in tears knowing that also a chapter of her life was ending, or had already ended. Nate and Blair were over. It felt awful leaving the apartment building, she was leaving her home, but actually that could have been the best thing for her. Maybe leaving was the best thing to do. Leave the apartment, leave the block, leave New York? She wondered where she would go, then it came to her. Serena. She had the house in California, that would be perfect. She shouldn't get too ahead of herself Serena would still probably be pissed at her about it but she had no one else. Of course Dan would be there for her but she could not land on their door step not with Katie nearing the end of her pregnancy. It would be a nightmare for Dan a hysterical Blair turning up on his door step, but that wouldn't work. Dan and Katie's apartment was in New York and Blair needed to get out of New York.
She found herself a few minutos later on Serena's door step full with self pity and begging for a helping hand.
“Serena. I don't have anywhere to go”
“Where do you want to go?”
Serena finally asked after a few minutos letting Blair suffer in her wallowing.
“Anywhere, just as far away from here as possible”
“You can stay at my California house”
“That's perfect S, just I need to get away from here. Nate, Chuck I can't deal with it all”
She had to run away from everything, she didn't want to deal with anything.
“Okay, but I have a few madami days to work here, you don't mind going on your own do you?”
Serena finally agreed.
“No, that's exactly what I need and Serena I'm sorry about what I sinabi yesterday about Nate”
“Don't worry, I'm sorry about not being exactly supportive”
“It's okay, Nate's still your friend too. So can I get out of here as soon as possible”
“How soon?”
“Tonight? Tomorrow?”
“We'll get you out there tomorrow”
Serena held onto Blair's hand and hugged her tightly reassuring her that her best friend was still her best friend. No matter what she had done.
        Meanwhile Chuck kept his word and an oras after he had left Nate and Blair's apartment he returned hoping to find Blair alone. Not Nate alone.
“Where is she?”
He asked aggressively.
“She's gone Chuck”
Nate drank down another glass of whiskey he had been saving.
“What?”
Chuck asked, all confused.
“She, Blair doesn't live here anymore”
Nate couldn't even look at Chuck he just continued to drink.
“So where is she?”
“I have no idea”
He mumbled as Chuck rolled his eyes and walked back towards the elevator, but he saw the state Nate was in and thought, Nate was his best friend at one point in his life, he should at least ask.
“Are you all right?”
“Yeah I'm great Chuck, you go get my ex”
Nate continued to drink to the end of the bottle still not looking anywhere near Chuck.
“I'll go get, your ex Nate. Why did you waste your time with her?”
He tried to be sensitive to Nate's feeling but the way he was pagganap annoyed him so he didn't take any of it into consideration.
“I was stupid to think she's changed”
He muttered.
“Yeah it was. Blair's never going to change, nobody except you wants her to change. She's perfect the way she is”
Nate mumbled a few madami words but Chuck couldn't tell what he was saying so he spent the whole night looking for Blair. He had knocked on Dan's door first remembering what Blair had sinabi to him about being her best friend but Dan knew nothing about it. Chuck being Chuck didn't believe a word that Dan had sinabi and spent the whole night banging on his door and waking them up. Until morning finally arrived and Dan just gave in and let Chuck in and let him paghahanap the apartment himself.
“She's not here!”
Dan yelled for what felt like the millionth time as Chuck finished searching all around the apartment.
“She's not!”
Chuck exhaled in annoyance to being proven wrong sa pamamagitan ng Dan Humphrey of all people.
“I know she's not! I told you that last night!”
Dan yelled again as Katie stepped out of the bedroom, rolling her eyes the first segundo she set eyes on Chuck.
“Is this jackass still here? I hope you know you've kept me awake of bloody night. I'm pregnant you know!”
As if he didn't. It was becoming very obvious.
“Yes I do know. I'm sorry, I just need to find Blair”
He apologized and searched his mind again to try figure out where Blair could be.
“Have you tried Serena?”
Dan asked as Chuck's eyes widened realizing that should have been his first port of call.
“Thanks Humphrey”
Chuck shook his hand and ran rapidly out the door.
“Any time Bass”
Dan mumbled
“God sake does he pag-ibig Blair or what?!”
“Yeah he does”
Dan smiled and nodded as he saw Chuck getting into his limo and all the while hoping he would find her. They were too good a couple to lose.
        Before the limo even got a chance to stop Chuck had pushed the door open and jumped out the door. He was so worried that if Blair was not with Serena, where would she be? With Eleanor and Cyrus maybe? He had no idea.
He knocked on the door while at the same time rubbed his eyes and yawned not having any sleep for thirty hours wasn't doing him any good.
“Serena! Is Blair here?”
He pushed he way in.
“No”
She sighed.
“I don't even know where she is”
“She's in California”
Serena didn't lie. Serena had gotten Blair on the last flight the nakaraan night to California, LAX.
“California? Right...”
Chuck walked back towards the door.
“What are you doing?”
Serena pulled on his arm.
“I'm going over there”
“You can't”
“I am. If I tell her again she'll come back”
Chuck tried to convince himself that that's all it needed.
“Chuck. It's over. Okay it's over. Please just accepted that”
Serena closed the door and pulled Chuck back into her apartment, trying her best to take care of her brother.
“I can't”
He sighed.
“You have too. It takes two”
“But I pag-ibig her”
He sat down on the sopa pushing his face into his palms.
“I know you do but...”
“You know the worst part is, In four, five years time we're going to be here again and I can't handle going through this again”
It had happened before and he knew it was going to happen again.
“I know but that's what you two do. You're Chuck and Blair”
Serena agreed with him and sat sa pamamagitan ng his side and held onto his hand.
“Exactly. We're Chuck and Blair. We always have been. It was never Nate and Blair. That was nothing. We were...”
He was right, and Serena knew that it only when Chuck sinabi it that it dawned on her.
“Listen Nate is one of my best mga kaibigan and they were happy together but if I got my way, you know who she'd be with”
She had to stay loyal to Nate sa pamamagitan ng saying it but Serena always thought that Chuck and Blair were endgame and now it seemed she was wrong.
“Why can't she realise that?”
He asked her, breaking down in tears.
“Some people just don't want to step out of their comfort zone. Blair can't”
It killed Serena seeing Chuck crying, she had never seen him in this state before. She wanted to make it better for him but it wasn't going to happen.
“Are you going back?”
He cleared his eyes of the tears and asked her.
“No. I'm not leaving you like this”
“Thanks. But don't feel like you have too”
He didn't want any pity what's so ever, he didn't seem to realize that Serena was as much his friend as Blair's.
“Chuck it doesn't matter what happened between your Dad and my Mom, you are still my brother. I'm staying because I want too”
He held tighter onto his hand and smiled at him.
“Thanks Serena”
He smiled back knowing at least there was one person he could always be sure was there for him, his sister. But even this didn't make him feel any better. What mattered was gone. Forever.
        One buwan Later.
Chuck was getting worse. Serena had been putting off going to California after all she could not leave Chuck the state he was in. He wasn't going into work, he spent the whole araw locked up in his office, not seeing anyone. He occasionally sighed some documents for the company but that was all. Serena didn't know what do to. He was heartbroken and what cures a broken heart?
Meanwhile three thousand miles away Blair had been hiding away in Serena's Beverly Hills home, but it had dawned on her that Serena would not be coming out there any time soon, she would be staying with Chuck. Even though Serena hadn't told Blair that's why she was staying in New York it was obvious to her that was the reason. But she did miss Serena, being alone in that big house was lonely, she didn't know anyone in L.A either so that made it worse. Shopping got tiring, boring, there was nothing to do. Just as she was feeling the loneliness and not seeing all of her mga kaibigan her phone rang.
“Hi Blair”
“Hello?”
She asked in confusion not knowing who it was.
“It's Dan”
He reminded her.
“Oh Dan! Hi, how are you? How are Katie and the twins?”
She smiled with joy, she hadn't heard anything from Dan for weeks, she realized she hadn't told him she was leaving.
“That's why I called. Katie went into labour last night”
“Oh my God!! They're born!”
Blair jumped up off the sopa grinning from ear to ear.
“Yeah, eighteen hours”
“Oh God! Poor Katie! Oh I can't I'm not there! How are they?”
Blair enquired.
“They're doing good Blair, perfectly healthy”
“That's great Dan, have you chosen names?”
“Yeah Grace and Zac”
“Oh I can not wait to see them”
Blair kept smiling and imagined what the twins would look like, hoping they would look like Katie, God help them if they were like Dan she giggled to herself.
“So you coming back sometime?”
“No. I'm okay here”
The smile left and she sinabi that lie. What she meant to say was she was okay hiding here.
“Oh Blair you have to come back! Anyway me and Katie have something we have to ask you”
“What?”
Blair asked puzzled.
“I'm not saying it over the phone, you'll have to come visit us”
“Of course I will, As soon as I can I'll come visit you”
“That'll be great”
Their conversation continued for another oras chatting about all the things that Blair had been getting up too in L.A, mostly lies about how much fun she was having and never wanting to return to New York, and Dan told her all about the birth of his twins and how he had to be escorted to the medical room sa pamamagitan ng the doctors having received a manuntok to the face sa pamamagitan ng Katie, Blair laughed hysterically for most of the time about that. But then Dan had to put the phone down and get back to his wife and children. Just as Blair hung up the phone not two minutos later it rang again. She thought it was Dan again.
“Hello”
“Blair”
It was Serena.
“Oh uy Serena, when are you coming out here?”
Blair asked.
“I'm not, I've got some madami work here in New York for the susunod few weeks”
That was lie, she felt like she couldn't leave Chuck.
“Oh right, well I'll just stay here then”
Blair knew it was lie but she didn't say a thing.
“So you're not coming back?”
“No, I'm happy here for now”
Most of what came out of Blair's mouth now were lies.
“So never?”
Serena asked.
“Maybe... Not sure. How's Chuck?”
She couldn't help herself but ask, being alone with not much too do did make her mind wonder about Chuck. Actually all she thought about was Chuck. What was Chuck doing? How was Chuck?
“He's not great as you well know... No wonder he wants to leave”
She muttered the last few words.
“What?”
“Nothing forget it”
Serena tried to ilipat off the subject.
“What?!”
Blair yelled demanding Serena tell her.
“Nothing. Forget I sinabi anything”
“What is it Serena?!”
Blair got annoyed that Serena was lying.
“Chuck wont be here anymore”
“What? Why?!!”
She yelled in shock
“Tomorrow, he's leaving”
“Leaving? Where?”
“He says he can't stay in New York anymore, he wont tell me where he's going”
Serena explained to Blair who was getting worried if Chuck left she wouldn't know where he was at least like this she knew where he was.
“Serena you have to stop him!
Blair shouted though the phone.
“Blair he's leaving!”
Serena kept saying those words over and over again it was like she was trying to make it worse for Blair.
“Serena!! Just stop him! I'm getting the susunod flight out!”
“Blair, don't make any quick decisions”
“I can't here you, you're breaking up!”
She grabbed a piece of tsokolate wrapping from the coffee mesa and crushed it into the phone's speaker.
“BLAIR!!”
Serena shouted from the other side!
“Sorry can't hear you S!”
She continued to crackle the paper and finally hung up.
The susunod thing she did was grab her pitaka and ran straight out the door. She didn't pack a bag, she didn't do anything people do before leaving home. But Blair wasn't leaving home, she was going home.

TO BE CONTINUED...

A/N: susunod chapter is the last chapter then we have the epilogue so I'm gonna leave Getting There and finish this one but I'm hoping to finish in like a week so hopefully I'll get Getting There up faster than usual but the susunod chapter will be a bit slower due to finishing this one. So anyway, what did you all think I bet your all happy that finally after 20 chapters Blair has stopped being denial and is admitting her feelings! Anyway please let me know what you thought, it's really appreciated. Thank you so much. xoxo