"It's ok, Kodi. I'm sure he doesn't still feel that way," Sicily assured me. "That was months ago! He was probably just hurt that you left." I shrugged.

"Well, it's not like you have anywhere else to go," Shiloh added. I pouted. They were right. There was no way I could go back to living in a car. Chance would definitely get sick again, only probably with something even worse.

"I'll think about it," I told them. I wanted to have time to think about my options. Just then, there was a knock on the door. I furrowed my eyebrows. Sicily pursed her lips to hide a smile. Shiloh shrugged.

"She insisted she wanted to see you if we ever found you," he explained. I handed Chance back to Sicily, who welcomed him with open arms. I crossed the room, and opened the door.

"Alice!" I gasped. I jumped up and wrapped my arms around her neck. She giggled and hugged me back.

"Hi Kodi," she sinabi warmly. I jumped back, and clasped my hands over my mouth in shock.

"OhmyGod... I'm so sorry!" I exclaimed. "I didn't mean to leave you like that! I... I was scared!" She shrugged, but anger still lingered in her features.

"It's fine. Just don't do anything stupid like that again, ok?" I nodded real fast. I let Alice inside, and she sat on the opposite side of me on the couch. Sicily handed me Chance back.

"This is Chance," I said, turning to Alice. She smiled.

"So all it took was this tiny little thing to make you leave your whole life behind?" she asked. She looked up for my reaction. I sinabi nothing. She laughed. "Well, I guess it's a good thing. If you didn't, I never would've met you." I grinned back at her.

"So what happened?" I asked. "I mean, after I left..."

"Well," Shiloh sighed. "We got there, and Alice was there. She sinabi you'd ran off."

"I didn't believe her," Sicily said. "I thought the whole thing had been a prank."

"But then they saw your kainan tapis with your name tag on it," Alice added.

"So, we stayed in town for about a week, looking around for you. But when there was no sign of you, we had nowhere to go," Shiloh told me. "So reluctantly, we went back home. We hoped that someone would find you, and call us, or something." Alice and Sicily nodded, pleased with his explanation.

"So what'd you do?" Sicily asked, turning the tables. I swallowed.

"Well, let's see. First, I drove around, then I decided to just keep my car in a parking lot. Tried to find a job, but couldn't. Then, I found this homeless shelter. I stayed there a long time. But then this woman that I met, Lucy, had to leave. I went with her, because I don't know. She was the only person around and she was nice. Then Chance was born, and she left..." I paused, remembering how alone and scared I was. I had had no idea how to raise a baby; I'd never even babysat!

I decided to not include the part when I gave Chance up and nearly killed him.

"We're going back, y'know," Sicily said. My throat closed up. As much as I didn't want to go back to the streets, how could I go back to having a normal life after being missing for almost a year, and now with a child? Shiloh patted my knee.

"We'll be with you every step of the way," he assured me. I nodded, but gripped Chance closer. I looked to Alice. She smiled and shrugged.

"An' I'll always be here if you need me too," she said.

***

We went back tahanan today. We rented out another motel (shocking), and stayed there for a while. Shiloh sinabi I could stay there for a while if I wanted to. Sicily and Shiloh stayed there with me. Alice stayed back home. I promised I keep in touch. While Sicily helped me take care of Chance, I chewed over the idea of reuniting with my dad.

"You're his daughter," Sicily said. "It's not like he can hate you or anything."

About three days later, I finally got up the courage to go. Shiloh drove me to Dad's house. It felt strange to go back tahanan after so long. Nothing had changed much, which for some reason, didn't ease my nervousness.

"Can you hold Chance?" I asked, handing him to Shiloh. He nodded, and started getting out of the car. "Actually, can you just stay here?" I asked him. Shiloh paused, and reluctantly sat back down. I walked up to the front door, and rang the doorbell. I stood there, fiddling with my fingers, and my puso pounding against my chest. I wanted to run, but my feet felt like cinder blocks.

Black little spots speckled the rim of my vision once I heard the dead-bolt unlocking. I blinked, trying to stay conscious. The door opened. I almost cried. Dad stood there, and surprise was obvious. He didn't say anything; just stood there with his eyes wide open and jaw dropped. My expression was probably a mirrored image.

"Kodi?" he asked, as if he wasn't sure it was really me. All I could do was smile shyly and nod.

"Hi Dad," I sinabi quietly. He cleared his throat, but didn't come any closer.

"What've you been up to," he said, sounding like the tanong was just a courtesy and he didn't really care much at all. Where to begin.

"Uh, well," I said, actually a little embarrassed. "I'm tahanan now. And... I had a baby boy." I looked up slowly at him for his reaction. He seemed unchanged. He just reached out and patted my shoulder. His touch made me want to hug him, and have him tell me he had missed me, or at least something like that. I wanted to be with my Dad and he'd make everything go back to normal.

"Good for you," he said. He actually sounded happy, even if he didn't look it. I smiled, hopeful.

"D'You wanna see him?" I asked. He lowered his eyebrows and pursed his lips.

"No," he said. He sounded disappointed in himself. Or me. My smile faded. The tears welled up in my eyes.

"But Dad, I ---"

"Kodi, I can't believe you got pregnant. Do you know what kind of parent that makes me look like?"

"Dad, it wasn't ----"

"I don't care what it was, Kodi... Your mother would be very disappointed in you." It felt like all the wind had been knocked out of me. That last sentence hit me really deep. Was he right? Mom knew it wasn't my fault, right? Was it my fault? I squeezed my eyes shut, and balled my hands into fists.

"Dad..."

"Hope everything works out for you and your kid," I heard my Dad say. The door slammed shut. I opened my eyes. He was gone. I heard the door lock. Before I knew it, Shiloh was at my side, ushering me to the car; probably to prevent me sobbing at the front door. But the hysterics didn't come. The few tears that I had shedded were the last ones to come.

"I told you..." I whispered to myself. Shiloh reached over and squeezed my hand.

"It'll be ok. We'll get you an apartment, ok?"

"I don't have a job," I pointed out. "How'm I gonna afford it?"

"I'll pay for it," Shiloh sinabi brightly.

"That's not fair. You're doing everything for me."

"That's because I care about you, and I want to help you, Kodi." I sighed.

We got back to the motel. I put Chance to bed. Shiloh kissed me before he left. He sinabi he'd look for available apartments when he got home,and that I'd have my own place within a couple weeks. I thanked him. Once he was gone, and I went to bed, and cried myself to sleep.