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posted by XxLalasaysxX
Here are my listahan of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let you know now i got alot of these from the youtube channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything or eating anything you might spit it or something.)

#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.

#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)

#3 Why was the walis late to work?
It overswept!

#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the baya they'd be bagels.

#5 What's Michelle Obama's paborito vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)

#6 Why does the kabute have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)

#7 What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)

#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.

#9 What do you call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!

#10 How do you make an octopus giggle ten times?
You give him ten-tickles (tenticles)

#11 How do you make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!

#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!

#13 What's a chicken's paborito composer?
Bach!

#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between you and me man, something smells." (Your nose)

#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."

#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."

#17 Why can't you hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)

#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher sinabi it was a piece of cake.

#19 Why did the kamatis blush?
It saw the salad dressing.

#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)

#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)

#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.

#23 How do you know if it's raining Pusa and dogs?
You step in a poodle (puddle)

#24 How do you know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)

#25 How do you get pikachu on a bus?
You pokémon (pok 'em on)

#26 Why can't you dress with pikachu in the room?
He'll pikachu (peek at you)

#27 What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)

#28 How do get holy water?
You boil the hell out of it!

#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD

#30 Why didn't the skeleton tumawid the road?
He didn't have the guts to.

#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)

#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)

#33 What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator

#34 What's kulay-rosas and fluffy?
kulay-rosas fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
kulay-rosas fluff holding it's breath.

#35 What happens when you drink 7 coca colas?
You burp 7up

#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.

#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!

#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.

#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)

#40 what did the isda say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!

#41 Why can't you trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)

Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope you liked them. Make sure you check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
 PewDiePie
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added by 3xZ
added by sakurahanazono
Source: derp.com
added by kittyraven
Source: Kittyraven (myself)
added by negar
added by cynti19
Source: via Yahoo! paghahanap
added by myau
added by xoheartinohioxo
Source: dailysquee.com
added by GaGaBoi
Source: GaGaBoi
added by BiteMeCullen107
added by CourtneyKatara
added by Mallory101
Alright basically the pamagat says it all so I'm just ganna jump into it.

1. Princess- it's a cute name for a girl who likes feeling really important and special

2. Beautiful/Gorgeous- basically it's one that every girl will pag-ibig and you don't have to worry about them not liking it

3. Sweetie Pie- okay this one is a good one if your girl is madami on the country side

4. Sweet Heart- another one that a lot of girls like

5. Babe/Baby- good most of the time

6. Kitten- this is a good one for girls who are either animal mga manliligaw or sweet, cute and playful

Look use these if you want but in my opinion make up...
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posted by Alma_
Chuck Norris Jokes

-Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

-Only Chuck Norris knows the true end of the movie Inception

-When Chuck Norris throws a boomarang it doesn't dare come back

-Do you know how many push ups Chuck Norris has done? All of them

-Neil Armstrong never went to the moon for NASA, he was trying to run away from Chuck Norris

-Chuck Norris knows the letter after Z

-Chuck Norris was the alien who told the Egyptians how to invent the pyramid

-What's Chuck Norris' paborito Number?....................CHUCK NORRIS

-Superman wears Chuck Norris underpants.

-When Chuck Norris falls out of a bangka he dosn't get wet the water gets Chuck Norrised

-Chuck Norris doesn't read books, he just stares them down until he gets the information he wants out of them.

-Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.

-Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
posted by Me_Iz_Here
1) Scenes with swearing will be removed

2) All nudity scenes of France will also be removed

3) Hapon is too "japanese" so 4Kids gives him blonde hair and blue eyes

4) All mentions of WW1 and WW2 will be removed

5) England's eyebrows will be too scary for little kids, so we give him thin eyebrows instead

6) All the Voice Actors will be American, and there will be no accents

7) Blood will be removed

8) Poland is actually a girl

9) Russia is removed because 4Kids are afraid of Russians (or anything that's foreign)

10) Prussia isn't a real country! So we'll remove him!

11) Neither is Sealand, so he is removed...
continue reading...
(there is no order)

1.Allen walker (d grey man)
2.Gaara (naruto/shippuden
3.Hatsuharu sohma (fruits basket)
4.Deidara (naruto shippuden)
5.Senri shiki (vampire knight)
6.Tsubasa otori (beyblade/metal masters)
7.Toushiro hitsugaya (bleach the movie)
8.Neji hyuga (naruto/shippuden)
9.Mystel (beyblade g revolution)
10.zelgardis breywords (the slayers)
11.hikaru (ouran highschool host club)
12.china (hetalia) (i think?)
13.hanabusa (vampire knight)
14.takama ichijo (vampire knight)
15.zaku (naruto) (deceased aka dead)
posted by cutiegirl01
01 Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
02 Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
03 Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
04 If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only segundos away from death.
05 Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony,...
continue reading...
posted by invadercalliope
When you turn around, who is that behind you?
Bury your claws in the darkness and shred the night
The raindrops turn to drops of blood and trickle down your cheek
If you have no place to return to
Stop on this finger, on this finger of mine
Where the evening cicadas cry in the forbidden forest
You cannot turn back anymore

__________________________________________________

furimuita sono ushiro no sorewa dare
kurayami ni tsume wo tatete yoru wo hikisaita
amadare wa chi no shizuku to natte hoho wo tsutaiochiru
mou dekonimo kaeru basho ga nainara
kono yubi tomare watashi no yubi ni
sono yubi goto tsuretetteageru
higurashi ga naku akazu no mori de
atomodori wa mou dekinai
1. Watch the sunset together.

2. Whisper to each other.

3. Cook for each other.

4. Walk in the rain.

5. Hold hands


6. Buy gifts for each other.

7. Roses.

8. Find out their paborito cologne/perfume and wear it every time you're together.

9. Go for a long walk down the tabing-dagat at midnight.

10. Write mga tula for each other.

11. Hugs are the universal medicine.

12. Say only when you mean it and make sure they know you mean it.

13. Give walang tiyak na layunin gifts of flowers/candy/poetry etc.

14. Tell her that she's the only girl you ever want. Don't lie!

15. Spend every segundo possible together.

16. Look into each other's eyes....
continue reading...