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I found this one on the internet:

Why did the chicken tumawid the road?

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MCCAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he was a maverick chicken, and he wanted to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

SARAH PALIN: The chicken had to tumawid the road because he was not able to find a bridge. Alaskans do not build bridges to nowhere. If he wanted a bridge, he'd have to build it himself.

JOE BIDEN: The chicken crossed the road because he was heading back to Scranton .

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken tumawid the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from araw One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to tumawid the road. But then, this really isn't about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either for us or against us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

COLIN POWELL: Now, to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not tumawid the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken tumawid the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's pagganap sa pamamagitan ng not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to tumawid this road so bad.So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a cert ain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken tumawid the road? Did he tumawid it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

GRANDPA: In my araw we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the puso warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to tumawid the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only tumawid roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This new platform is much madami stable and will never reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really tumawid the road, or did the road ilipat beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
posted by BJsRealm
This world definitely need a single global currency.I hope BTC would become a global currency in the near future.So far,BTC is just a cryptocurrency used only on .onion sites yet someday it just might become the new official global/UN electronic currency.
posted by Seanthehedgehog

An Imperial landing craft was leaving Coruscant. However, no Imperials were inside. It was only two men from the Republic.

Republic Pilot: *Looking at the clear sky. No other ships are seen as they are out of Coruscant*
Colonel Turner: *Walks up, and sits susunod to the pilot* Thirty five minutes. Can we make it?
Republic Pilot: We can make it. Will your mga kaibigan make it?
Colonel Turner: Let's hope so.

Song: link

John made it back to the shed with Morris, Mary, and Cartwright where Heidi was waiting in the speeder bus.

Heidi: *Puts up a jammer, and turns it on*
John: *Starts the speeder bus,...
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posted by TheLefteris24
 Praise Kek!
Praise Kek!
Heed those words Mortals and set yourselves free!

There is no peace, there is PEPE
There is no fear, there is Shadilay(Peace be upon him).
There is no death, there is God Emperor.
There is no weakness, there is the MEMES.

I am the puso of darkness.
I know no fear.
But rather I instil it in my enemies.
I am the destroyer of worlds.
I know the power of the MEMES.
I am the apoy of hate.

All the universe bows before kek.
I pledge myself to kek.
For I have found true life In the death of SocJus.

Peace is a lie, there is only Kek.
Through passion, I gain salt.
Through Shadilay(Peace be upon him), I gain power.
Through power, I gain Lulz.
Through victory, my chains are broken.
The MEMES shall set me free.

Preached sa pamamagitan ng the Enlightened Prophet known as ''The Turbo Syncretist''. The truth has been spoken! Know
T
h
e

C
o
d
e

o
f

K
e
K

Praise Kek !!!!
 KEK WILLS IT!
KEK WILLS IT!
posted by twinklestar11
My paborito singer/raper is Bars and Melody. They began singing/rapping July 2014. At that time I had no idea who they were till 2016. People don't like them, but i dont know why. Maybe cuz those people dont like rapping or listening to young kid bands. They rapper is Leondre who started rapping when he was 13. People say it was 14, but the Bars and Melody song was relased in July and Leondre's birthday is in October so he was accully 13 when he started. The singer is Charlie. Charlie was pag-awit when he was 15. His birthday is also in October. They are no longer 13 and 15. Leondre is now 16...
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 Episode 3 has arrived!
Episode 3 has arrived!
Welcome back again mates! In case you missed the first episode, here's a quick recap of what this artikulo series is all about.

In the first episode, the debut of this show, I thought up five crazy and walang tiyak na layunin scenarios that I thought would make for entertainingly cringy headlines for Newspapers and/or YouTube videos, and asked you all for ideas in the comments section below! That's also how this ipakita has been running since Episode 2, so if you like this series, then don't forget to tagahanga and leave a comment below on what you guys and gals want me to create in the susunod episode!

And with that being...
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Hi YouTube fans. There are several interesting shows on YouTube and several of aren't really well known. The following 5 channels are made sa pamamagitan ng very nice and talented people. I highly recommend checking out these channels.

5. Doodletones

Doodletones is a member of the Commentary Community. She's a very talented commentator who knows how to be both informative and entertaining. She makes bidyo frequently so you don't have to worry about running out of bidyo to watch.

4. FutureGohanSSJ2

FutureGohanSSJ2 is a cartoon lover. He has plenty of bidyo where he talks about cartoon relater merchandise...
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How do I become sarcastic?
"I'm the reyna of sarcasm, you don't just suddenly become sarcastic, it takes practice"


My house is on fire, what do I do?
"You get off the fuckin computer and go outside!"


My brother hasn't had his period:
"Yeah. It takes longer for boys"


What's an appropriate site for a 13 taon old girl?
"Try Porn-Hub"


Can you get pregnant from watching porn?
"Only on wednesdays"


Every time I drink alcohol I feel sad.
"Your not drinking ENOUGH of of it!"


I was having sex with my sister and got a cramp in my leg.
"YOU HAD SEX WITH YOUR SISTER!?"


Why are mga sanggol ugly at first?
"How about you...
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added by Mollymolata
added by shaneoohmac13
added by ace2000
posted by Canada24
#1:
Critic: So our story begins when they spot two children who, you guessed it, stopped caring.
Friend Bear: Hi. I'm Friend Bear, and this is Secret Bear. We're Care Bears. (both stand up and pose)
Jason: (in disgusted tone) What do you want?
Friend Bear: Only to be your friends.
NC (vo): Actually, I always wondered what counted as quote/unquote "Caring." I mean, if I'm ordering a pizza with a friend, is it like...
[Cuts to skit with two NCs talking to each other]
NC 1: Hey, what kind of toppings you want?
NC 2: Eh, I don't care. (In panicked tone) No, no, wait! I didn't mea- (sparkling effects sound...
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Welcome to my complete character index! Basically, over the years I've made up a lot of either my own characters, or added existing ones from shows and whatnot for the sake of entertainment and imagination.

And in this one, you'll see all of them from A-Z, as well as their history. So without further ado, let's get this night off right!

AnimuLuvr21


First Appearance: A araw In The Life Of A Fanpop User


(The character above is Konata Izumi from Lucky Star)

A character I made in one of my skit articles, and I do plan on using her in madami articles, as long as the context fits well.

Personality is...
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I've been meaning to do this for a while. This is a countdown, meaning that number one is the best. Also, this is just my personal opinion so keep your rude comments to yourself. I hope you like it and please tell me what you think.
 10. Gilda Radner. A talented lady.
10. Gilda Radner. A talented lady.
 9. Maia Morgenstern. Mother of Hesus in Passion of the Christ.
9. Maia Morgenstern. Mother of Jesus in Passion of the Christ.
 8. Robert Shaw. Ole Quint.
8. Robert Shaw. Ole Quint.
 7. Divine. pag-ibig him or hate him, you've got to admire his guts.
7. Divine. Love him or hate him, you've got to admire his guts.
 6. Natalie Wood. Soooo pretty! I've got a crush on her.
6. Natalie Wood. Soooo pretty! I've got a crush on her.
 5. Lionel Barrymore. A wonderful actor.
5. Lionel Barrymore. A wonderful actor.
 4. Sharon Tate. What a woman! My ultimate girl crush.
4. Sharon Tate. What a woman! My ultimate girl crush.
 3. Fred Rogers. Big part of my childhood.
3. Fred Rogers. Big part of my childhood.
 2. G.W. Bailey. Aww, pag-ibig this guy!
2. G.W. Bailey. Aww, love this guy!
 1. Sal Mineo. Oh my gosh, I pag-ibig pag-ibig pag-ibig this man! The first time I saw him was on ‘Escape from the Planet of the Apes’. I’ve been in pag-ibig with him for many years. He's the stuff dreams are made of.
1. Sal Mineo. Oh my gosh, I LOVE LOVE LOVE this man! The first time I saw him was on ‘Escape from the Planet of the Apes’. I’ve been in love with him for many years. He's the stuff dreams are made of.
added by 0YouCanFly0
1-Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or self-confidence.
(Robert Frost)

2-The roots of education are mapait but the prutas is sweet.
(Aristotle)

3-Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the future. (Nelson Mandela)

4-Education is not learning of facts , but the training of minds to think. (Albert Einstein)

5-Education is not preparation for life, Education is life
itself (John Dewey)

6-Education is the movement from darkness to light.
(Allan Bloom)

7-The highest result of education is tolerance.
(Helen Keller)
When a guy flirts with other women.while out with his girl, it. may be he is just trying to be funny and charming or seem polite. Or he may secretly be feeling insecure. Maybe he fears his gal is still.into her ex, or worries she may be seeing simeone else besides him. He wont come out and say his fears, so rather he tries to appear madami of a stud flirting with ladies. What he may not realize is this drives a gal away and makes her feel unimportant. How would a guy like it if a gal behaved that way toward him? Does anyone have any suggestions how to deal with this obnoxious male behavior? Does a gal call him out on it? Or simply walk away, as I did from a guy I loved a lot, and not call him out on it, just simply tell him, "You hurt me."?
posted by deathding
 Let's do this.
Let's do this.
-When I go off to a restaurant/store and the lines are longer than the birago River

-When I'm hungry/thirsty but am too lazy to do anything about it

-Doing the same chores every araw of the week

-Waking up when I'm REALLY tired

-40% of the current generation for being senseless jerks with little to no knowledge of courtesy or grammar

-When someone spoils a movie I wanted to see

-When I bite my tongue/lip

-Random black-outs that interrupt EVERYTHING

-When I go somewhere just to find out that it's been closed for an hour

-Being forced to go somewhere when I REALLY don't want to

-School Days, both the anime...
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posted by Canada24
#10: LUCY:
I haven't actually seen this movie, but somebody told me how stupid the ending is.
Lucy reaches 100% of her cerebral capacity and disappears within the spacetime continuum, where she explains that everything is connected and existence is only proven through time. Only her clothes and the black supercomputer are left behind.
And she herself suddenly disappears into thin air.
leaving only a text, saying, "I AM EVERYWHERE!".
It's bad enough Hellsing Ultmate pulled that line..

#9: TWO AND A HALF MEN:
I pag-ibig this show, but it become less and less popular after Charlie left. And the producers...
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I wanted to include some of my paborito disturbing events in history. This is only a brief overview of the events, I encourage you to go research them yourselves. I intentionally included a lot of the lesser known events in history.

0, Ant-walking alligator people of Hiroshima
I know this is an old artikulo that probably no one goes to anymore, but I have something I need to take off my mind. I am a little hard to disturb when it comes to military history, but this... I've been struggling with it all morning. I'll just say this, don't look it up, don't look for the pictures, save yourself the...
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